Talk:Jadunath Singh/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Zawed (talk · contribs) 06:20, 24 October 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Some initial comments:

This article probably lacks enough content to be considered a GA. Some notable gaps that need to be filled: what did he do prior to enlistment (he was 25 at the time of joining up); his service from the period 1941 to 1947 (which overlapped with WWII - what was his unit doing during this time); when he was promoted to Naik; his burial (if applicable); who nominated him for the Param Vir Chakra; the whereabouts of his medal (is it held in a military museum or such); was he married and did he have any children?
Lead: It is stated that Singh was the fourth recipient of the Param Vir Chakra. However, this is not mentioned in the article body itself and thus is uncited.
The Early life section is very short. It probably does not warrant its own section and the same applies to the Legacy section. Unless his early life can be expanded, I would suggest having the main heading as "Biography", with War of 1947 as the major subheading.
The article states twice that he joined the army, the first in the Early Life section, and then the Military career section.
The lead and the War of 1947 section used some non-encyclopedic language, so I have copyedited these.

Although I suspect that it will be difficult to find sufficient content to bring this article up to GA standard, I will place this review on hold for a week to await any possible improvements. Cheers. Zawed (talk) 06:20, 24 October 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@Zawed: Firstly, many thanks for the review. Coming to the issues raised, I have added as much information as I could from all the sources after about 2 to 3 hours of search. The information that I presented is mostly available from the books, and web sources doesn't have much information than that was already there. I expanded the early life and military career sections as much as the information is available. Please have a look at the article. Regards, Krishna Chaitanya Velaga (talk • mail) 13:28, 24 October 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@Zawed: Please have a look at the article after the improvements. Regards, Krishna Chaitanya Velaga (talk • mail) 12:40, 28 October 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Having reviewed your changes, while they do increase its content I still believe it is insufficient for GA class. I have done a bit of a copy edit on the new material for conciseness and clarity. Some further comments:

Can we have an English translation of his nickname?
"Gallantry" actions are mentioned as a factor for his promotion. What were these actions? Even if you can't find this specific information, you could probably add a bit of information about his battalion's service in the war as that would indicate what he did.
I notice you deleted the reference to Singh being the fourth recipient of the PVM. On my first review I noted this fact was in the lead but not cited. If you are able to find a cite, you should add this fact to the article body, probably following the information about his marriage status.
Whereabouts of the PVM now?

I hope this helps. Zawed (talk) 09:11, 1 November 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@Zawed: I have given the translation, but comply with according the MOS. All that I could get about his battalion is a sentence that I have mentioned. Whereabouts of the PVM is indeterminable. This is the maximum level of information that can be presented. Regards, Krishna Chaitanya Velaga (talk • mail) 10:02, 3 November 2016 (UTC)[reply]

I prefer renaming the early life section as "Personal life" and moving the statement about his marriage into this. Because the current position as it is under the Military career would not be appropriate. Regards, Krishna Chaitanya Velaga (talk • mail) 10:03, 3 November 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Krishna, I have moved the material RE his marriage status back to where it was and done a little more revision to further condense the text. RE the translation, it is not clear to me as a native English speaker what the meaning is; I have had a go what I think you mean but please review this. I note the wikilink to Khajuri is a dab link, this needs to be fixed. Finally, reviewing the "War of 1947" section, I note there is no reference to his regiment. The mention of a unit is the 50th Para Brigade. I assume he was not a member of this brigade, so a mention that his regiment/battalion was among those involved in the action is required. Zawed (talk) 08:38, 8 November 2016 (UTC)[reply]

@Zawed: I added the missed link-up sentence regarding his unit. Also added some follow-up and background. Please have a look. Regards, Krishna Chaitanya Velaga (talk • mail) 12:56, 8 November 2016 (UTC)[reply]

I have made some more changes but I'm afraid I still feel it is not quite GA standard - the key thing for me is the current whereabouts of the medal plus the lack of material on his WWII service. Without this, I don't think it meets the coverage criteria. I also note that Khajuri is still a dab link. Accordingly, I have failed the article. I have updated the assessment though, to B-Class. Happy to look at this one again should you find further information to expand it and better meet the coverage criteria. I hope that the learnings from this one will be applied to other articles that you work on and bring to GAR. Cheers. Zawed (talk) 09:42, 13 November 2016 (UTC)[reply]

No worries Zawed. Actually the information available about the PVC recipients is very very limited. Only we have two to three books on this topic. Anyways, fortunately we have some considerable content on some recipients. What about the other review? I think it has enough content. Regards, Krishna Chaitanya Velaga (talk • mail) 05:21, 15 November 2016 (UTC)[reply]