Talk:Industrial change in occupied Japan

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The link in reference 2 is broken. The only place I found the CCS manual is in a forum post that you need to register for to download: http://elsmar.com/Forums/showthread.php?t=3376

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Possible Changes

Hello,

I am a new user looking through this article, and I think I have spotted some things that may be missing or could be improved on. Some may be minor, while others may not be. I hope this quick list helps.

1. "Since 1913, and their failure to make changes contributed to their losing World War II." Possibly reword it to "changes contributed to their loss of World War II."

2. There are some names that do not have any hyperlinks, like Dr. Kaoru Ishikawa, Homer Sarasohn, and Kennith Hopper. There are other names, but I can't find them on Wikipedia, so if anyone else could, that would be fantastic.

3. Quality Control and QC. I know it is quoted, but there is no mention that the abbreviation of Quality Control is QC, if this is correct. It is easy to tell to some people, but if QC is Quality control, it should be mentioned such as Quality Control (QC).

4. "Dr K Ishikawa" should be "Dr. K Ishikawa." I also think that the full name should be mentioned before any abbreviation of the first name, since it starts with Dr. K Ishikawa and not Dr. Kaoru Ishikawa. If they're the same person.

These are a few things I've spotted while looking through the article. I also think that there may be some rewording needing to be done, since some of the sentences feel kind of off. There could also be more explanation on certain aspects such as the radio program and the fact that the last section, "Other American Seminars and Leaders" is filled with nearly all quotes. This could be wrong, though, but as someone who read through it, I was left with more questions than answers.

I hope any of this was able to help, even if a little!

JK302 (talk) 11:45, 24 September 2023 (UTC)[reply]