Talk:Horizon Forbidden West/GA1
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Nominator: OceanHok (talk · contribs) 11:22, 21 May 2024 (UTC)
Reviewer: PresN (talk · contribs) 22:33, 10 July 2024 (UTC)
Alright, let's review this! I don't use the template, but instead do a bulleted list of thoughts as I go through the article. Honestly, I don't have that much- stylistically you're wordier/more detailed than I prefer, but there's nothing wrong with that (and certainly not at GA), and the article is very solid overall. --PresN 22:33, 10 July 2024 (UTC)
- Did copyediting in place rather than listing it here. It's mostly tense issues.
"Melee combat is significantly expanded when compared with Zero Dawn."
- we need a little more description of how the melee combat works in this game beyond the differences to the prior game.- Gameplay never defines what Aloy's Focus is (either as a game mechanic or an in-game item)
- In general, the plot section uses so many Capitalized words and names that it becomes really difficult to follow. Consider if you really need to give so many specific details and names. It's also just long in general- WP:VG/PLOT recommends a 700 word plot section, and just the "Plot" subsection is 769, plus another 117 for Synopsis.
- Synopsis for some reason gives a little bit of plot summary, not just the setting. There's no reason to be summarizing the next 4 paragraphs. Except does it? The "plague" is never mentioned again, instead the plot section says she goes to the Forbidden West to find a GAIA backup.
- Tastes of the Seven Tribes got released a couple weeks ago (so it also needs a new source)
- Reception feels a little scattershot, like every other sentence is about something else in whatever bucket that paragraph is about. I don't think it's an issue for GA.
- You don't need to specify e.g. "530,454 units" in sales; it's over-specific. "over 530,000" is easier to parse
- Used a random number generator to pick sources to check, and they all came back clean. Didn't see any non-RSs. Consider using the |trans-title parameter to provide title translations for the non-English references.
- @PresN: - Thanks for the review! I think I have corrected most of the issues you have raised. OceanHok (talk) 11:02, 11 July 2024 (UTC)
- Tweaked some things; promoting. --PresN 18:20, 11 July 2024 (UTC)