Talk:HMS Revenge (06)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Peacemaker67 (talk · contribs) 09:19, 27 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]

A few comments from me:

link interwar period in the lead
link Displacement (ship)
the designed displacement doesn't match between the infobox and body
suggest two pairs of Parson's
- At this time, turbines were divided into high- and low-pressure turbines in a set, with each driving one shaft. Later they were combined into one casing so each shaft was driven by a set of turbines, although this latter is often ignored.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 21:05, 29 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]
the boiler types don't match between the infobox and body
don't we use the sea trial speed in the infobox?
the range conversions don't match between the infobox and body, rounding error?
why use the 1917 crew size in the infobox when the 1916 one is as built? Also, I don't see the 1917 crew size in the body.
the TT conversions don't match between the infobox and body
the conning tower maximum armour thickness doesn't match between the infobox and body
any info about the types of aircraft she carried?
suggest "The aft torpedo tube of each pair was also removed at that time"
suggest "and adding ~~the~~a portside octuple..."
suggest "The ~~forward pair of~~remaining submerged torpedo tubes", but I query whether "submerged" is required, as they only had submerged TTs?
- Yeah, though I think that all the refs to the tubes could be simplified to forward and aft tubes. Wow, it's really apparent that I didn't update the infobox when I overhauled the description a few years ago. Thanks for bouncing them against each other to catch all these.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 21:05, 29 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]
if using 1st BS, introduce BS as the initialisation when introducing the squadron?
"but this fell over" is an odd turn of phrase. Perhaps "overshot the target"?
suggest "Two of ~~the~~her hits on Derfflinger" as we have just mentioned other ships firing on Derfflinger
"with ~~the~~ Revenge"
link Resolution
instead of "For the duration of the war that she served", suggest "for the remainder of her service in the war"
"On the following day. Revenge" should be a comma
just for consistency, suggest 21½ be 21.5
I think it should be "18-minute bombardment"?
"three surviving sisters" begs the question of which ship had been lost
say what sort of ship Hermes was and link at first mention, and drop "the carrier" from second mention
"Ramillies and her sisters" I think this is a copypaste error and should be Revenge? This occurs again
"on the morning onof 9 April"
link Royal Sovereign
Switky could do with a location of publication
the cost in the infobox isn't covered in the article
images all look fine.

That's me done. Placing on hold for the above to be addressed. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 09:19, 27 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for your most thorough review. See if my changes are satisfactory.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 00:48, 30 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]

This article is well-written, verifiable using reliable sources, covers the subject well, is neutral and stable, contains no plagiarism, and is illustrated by appropriately licensed images with appropriate captions. Passing. Nice work! Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 03:08, 30 March 2019 (UTC)[reply]