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Talk:HMS Defence (1861)/GA1

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GA Review

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Reviewer: Skinny87 (talk) 09:20, 10 October 2010 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for criteria)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
    'She became guard ship on the Shannon when she recommissioned' - S would this be a second recommissioning, presumably after being de-commissioned for the '72-'74 refit?
    Does that need to be specified?
    Probably wouldn't hurt to clarify.
    How does it read now?
    'Both breech-loading guns were new designs from Armstrong and much was hoped for them' - Not entirely sure of this, but 'from them' or 'of them' sounds more grammatically correct to me.
    Agreed
    As you did for the Valiant, can we have a footnote on the usage of Armoured frigate/ironclad?
    Done
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
    Second paragraph of the first section on Design and Description is uncited.
    Cited.
    Do we know why she was re-rigged as a barque for a short period? Was this usual for ironclads?
    I have no idea, probably to experiment with different rigs to see what worked best for such a large ship.
    That's fine.
    And any idea why the original armament was reduced?
    When, 1867? The 7 and 8-inch muzzle-loaders were heavier than her original guns.
    Adding that would be great.
    Done.
    When were the 110-pound guns taken off of the Defence?
    When she refit in '67.
    Why were the ends of the ship left entirely unprotected? This seems like a major design flaw after all.
    Explained.
    'Defence damaged her propeller and rudder when she was nearly blown ashore herself in March 1872.' - Was this due to heavy winds?
    They actual struck the bottom in the trough of one wave, but I couldn't figure out how to explain that easily.
    What you've said above makes sense, so I'd add that.
    How does it read now?--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 15:54, 10 October 2010 (UTC)[reply]
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects): b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
    The HMS Defence (1868) picture is currently breaking the section breaks between Armament and Armour. Suggest moving to the right-hand side.
    Agreed.
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:

Interesting article. A few things to look at, and it can pass. Skinny87 (talk) 09:20, 10 October 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for the review.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 13:47, 10 October 2010 (UTC)[reply]
No problem, points added above. Skinny87 (talk) 14:35, 10 October 2010 (UTC)[reply]
Looks good now, so I'll pass. Skinny87 (talk) 16:02, 10 October 2010 (UTC)[reply]