Jump to content

Talk:Grey Gowrie/GA1

Page contents not supported in other languages.
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

GA Review

[edit]

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: GhostRiver (talk · contribs) 16:50, 10 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]


I can take a look at this! — GhostRiver 16:50, 10 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Good Article review progress box
Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV ()
3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant ()
Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

Infobox and lede

[edit]
  • "he turned it down, causing some scandal when he said that the salary of £33,000 was not enough to live on in London, despite being three times the average salary in the city." seems WP:UNDUE, since this was only given one sentence in the body - this was included as it was a point which followed the subject for years after, but indeed, in the overall context, perhaps not lede material and so removed.

Life

[edit]

Early life and education

[edit]
  • End the WL after just "Alexander Hore-Ruthven" - done
  • Properly disambiguate Lough Derg - as no source is clear on which Lough Derg, simply removed, sentence simplified.
  • "at which point he became" → "at which point Gowrie became" - done.

Titles and university

[edit]
  • Rather than parentheses around "the Scottish lordship", that can be made into a separate sentence - done.

Academic and art dealer

[edit]
  • Replace hyphen and spaces with new sentence after "National Gallery of Ireland" - done.
  • Link to National Gallery of Art for the Washington museum - done.

Political career

[edit]
  • When was he appointed a Conservative whip? - done, and merged with another point.
  • Comma after "said of him" - done.
  • No italics are needed around the ministerial posts - done.
  • "(deputy to the Secretary of State)" → "a deputy position to the Secretary of State," - clarified.
  • Pipe "IRA hunger strikes" to 1981 Irish hunger strike - done.
  • "Thatcher appointed him" → "Thatcher appointed Gowrie" - done.
  • hyphens to en dash after "broader political philosophy" - done.
  • Per MOS:ELLIPSIS, three dots are used rather than two - done.
  • Split sentence after "he could "electrify education"." - done.
  • "working in such posts, a claim that caused" → "working in such posts. The claim caused" - done.
  • Among whom did it cause agitation? - the sources refer to this vaguely, at most to "public disquiet / agitation / negativity" so I reworded in that direction.

Later career

[edit]
  • Hyphen and spaces to comma after "Arts Council of England" - done.
  • The sentence with the direct quote about "the appointment of a Scott" should have a citation immediately following, per MOS:INTEGRITY - removed, and a similar but earlier quotation inserted into the Northern Ireland section - with direct citation.
  • There's something of a punctuation jumble after "The book needed cutting, like a movie" - fixed.
  • Dates for most of the events in the third paragraph would be appreciated - several added.

Writing

[edit]

Early writings

[edit]
  • Comma needed after Postcard from Don Giovanni - done.

Heath and later writings

[edit]
  • "he received a heart transplant" → "Gowrie received a heart transplant" - done.
  • Replace hyphen and spaces with em dash after "contains references to his illness" - done.
  • Citation needed for "Collected Poems" - done.
  • Make this all one paragraph to avoid having a one-sentence para - done.

Personal life

[edit]

Residences

[edit]
  • "moved to the village of Llanfechain in what was formerly Montgomeryshire, the village being in the Welsh Marches" → "moved to the Welsh Marches village of Llanfechain, in what was formerly Montgomeryshire." - done.

Family

[edit]
  • I don't believe it's necessary to have a bulletpoint for only one child - done (this was from an early version of the article, in a style common in peerage articles, but agreed, no need.
  • No comma needed after "1944 plot to assassinate Hitler" – current sentence construction makes it sound like he married Adelheid and Charlotte - done.

Friends

[edit]
  • Extra space between sentence and citation for the sentence ending "Johnson's first marriage" - done.
  • For clarity, the part about finding out that he and Bacon had grown up in the same town should be placed before a separate sentence about Boris Johnson - done.
  • ""The greatest journalist of my generation"." → ""[t]he greatest journalist of my generation"." - done.

Death

[edit]
  • No comma needed after "died after a long illness" - done.

References

[edit]
  • Good

General comments

[edit]
  • Photos N/A
  • No stability concerns in the revision history
  • Earwig score looks good, all proper nouns and attributed direct quotes

Putting on hold now to allow nominator to address comments. Ping me with questions. — GhostRiver 17:22, 10 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Many thanks GhostRiver for a thorough review. I have attempted to address each point. Most I have acted upon directly, while in 3-4 cases, I removed or reworked material to better the article as a whole. I hope this helps. SeoR (talk) 22:28, 10 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Made one last tweak myself on a second read-through, and now it looks good! Happy to pass! — GhostRiver 22:38, 10 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks for a most precise and efficient GA process, GhostRiver, and for the supporting closing edit. I will continue to work on this article - I have found 2-3 new sources. Sorry for late reply, suddenly remote for the last working week. SeoR (talk) 10:43, 15 October 2021 (UTC)[reply]