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Talk:Gnaraloo worm-lizard/GA1

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GA Review

[edit]

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Nominator: AryKun (talk · contribs) 09:30, 26 July 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Reviewer: CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk · contribs) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]


Rate Attribute Review Comment
1. Well-written:
1a. the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct. "... with a snout–vent length between 60 and 98 cm (24 and 39 in), with an average of 84.8 cm (33.4 in),..."

I'm confused by this sentence. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Tweaked it a bit, hopefully it's clearer now.

"Individuals have been collected from sand hillocks stabilized by vegetation, under leaf litter, and below rotting stumps and logs set in sand."

This may just be my lack of knowledge in the area but what are you trying to say here? CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]

It's meant to give an idea of the kinds of environments that the species is found in.

"Specimens of worm-lizards attributable to Aprasia litorea were first collected from the Lake Macleod region in 1980 by G. M. Storr and G. Harold in 1980;"

Does 1980 need to be in this sentence twice? CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Fixed.

"The specific epithet"

I don't think this term is understandable to a broad audience. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Changed.

"as being sister (most closely related) to A. haroldi."

This isn't a critique I just wanted to say that adding the definition of sister in this context makes it a lot easier to understand. I know the science topics can be hard to write about in a way that's easy to understand so good job on making sure you don't overuse technical terms! CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]

You used the term "snout–vent length" several times in the article. I think it would be worth defining what snout–vent length is somewhere in the article as the average reader may not know what that is. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Added gloss.

"with 12 rows of scales at the mid-body"

I'm not sure if this is grammatically correct. I will have to look into this but should it be scales on the mid-body instead of at? CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]

At the mid-body is correct; the number of scale rows varies with the thickness of the torso along the body. Since the middle of the body (mid-body) is usually the thickest portion, it's used as a standard measurement to distinguish different species.

"The eyes are large and placed above the third upper labial scale."

Using the word "placed" seems a bit odd in this context. Is there any way you could reword this? CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Changed to located.

"Brownish streaks extend from behind the head, forming two indistinct lines of brownish streaks and slowly becoming more well-defined and eventually forming multiple lines on the tail."

Is there a way you could reword this sentence to be more readable? Using "and" twice makes the sentence sound a bit odd. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Removed the second "and".

" Additionally, the laterodorsal lines formed by brownish streaks on the upper end of the sides are poorly demarcated from the greyish sides in the Gnaraloo worm-lizard, but the two are clearly separated by a gap in the Hermite Island worm-lizard."

This sentence is really long and doesn't make sense to me. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]

I've reworded it, hope it's clearer now.

"wide strip of coastal sand dunes and sandplains west of Lake Macleod, from Gnaraloo south to Quobba Station."

I kind of understand what you are trying to say here but I feel like this sentence is a bit hard to read. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]

I can't think of a better way to word it.

"The entire known range of this species is managed for grazing and has no protected areas"

What does "managed for grazing" mean? CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Added link, means that it's managed by someone to make sure that it remains high-quality grazing land. Basically they ensure it doesn't get overgrazed or overrun by weeds and such.
1b. it complies with the Manual of Style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]
2. Verifiable with no original research, as shown by a source spot-check:
2a. it contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]
2b. reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose). I was able to access and verify all of the sources used. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 21:13, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]
2c. it contains no original research. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 21:13, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]
2d. it contains no copyright violations or plagiarism. All of the writing was put into the writers own words. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 21:13, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]
3. Broad in its coverage:
3a. it addresses the main aspects of the topic. "moderately angled when seen from the side"

Could you expand on what moderately angled means? I feel like this is a bit too vague. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Replaced with angular, which is what the source uses.

"more uniform towards the front and blending to greyish towards the tail."

I would add "more uniform in color" to this sentence assuming that is what you mean. I would just add this myself but I want to double check that you do mean uniform in color. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Done.
3b. it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style). CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]
4. Neutral: it represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]
5. Stable: it does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]
6. Illustrated, if possible, by media such as images, video, or audio:
6a. media are tagged with their copyright statuses, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]
6b. media are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions. I couldn't find any free images online. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:02, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]
7. Overall assessment. On hold until @AryKun: can address the issues outlined in 1a and 3a. According to their userpage their laptop is currently broken so I will give them more than a week to respond to these issues. There are some minor issues with readability but that is somewhat to be expected when writing about certain topics. Everything is well-referenced and I appreciate the fact that all of the sources are easily accessible. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 21:13, 23 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]

All issues have been addressed or fixed by the nominator. CursedWithTheAbilityToDoTheMath (talk) 20:53, 24 August 2024 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.