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Talk:Gingham dress of Judy Garland

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GA Review

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The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


This review is transcluded from Talk:Gingham dress of Judy Garland/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Thebiguglyalien (talk · contribs) 01:51, 27 August 2023 (UTC)[reply]


I'll have a review written for this within the next day or two. Thebiguglyalien (talk) 01:51, 27 August 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Changedforbetter, I've posted the review below. The prose reads really well, but I want to take a closer look at the WP:Text-source integrity. Thebiguglyalien (talk) 05:07, 27 August 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@Thebiguglyalien Hi there, thank you so much for posting your review! I wasn't expecting this nomination to get picked up so quickly. I'll begin working on and addressing each point within the next few days; please be advised that it could take me longer than the usual 7-day turnaround to complete the revisions due to real-world commitments, approximately three weeks at most. Changedforbetter (talk) 17:33, 28 August 2023 (UTC)[reply]
@Thebiguglyalien Hello, just letting you know that all points below have been addressed. Awaiting final verdict. Changedforbetter (talk) 04:23, 7 September 2023 (UTC)[reply]
Well-written

Lead:

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  • were styled to hide her womanly figure – This feels euphemistic.
  • and often paired with ruby slippers – "often" doesn't really work when describing the "complete outfit". Maybe this should be its own sentence.

History:

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  • musical fantasy film adaptation of the bookMOS:SEAOFBLUE. It might be simpler just to say "film adaptation".
  • He made approximately 8–10 different prototypes – Is "approximately" necessary if it provides a range?
  • Garland had worn through all 10 dresses during production – Earlier in the paragraph it suggested that it's uncertain how many were made, but this seems to definitively state that there were ten.
  • the total was likely closer to 4–6 – The total made or the total worn out?

Design and analysis:

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  • "Noted" shouldn't be used to describe subjective opinions. This appears three times in the last paragraph of this section.
  • The color blue has been noted to be symbolic – "Has been noted" is wordy. Either describe its symbolism directly or attribute it specifically to whoever is making this association.

Reception and impact:

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  • In a review published by the Library of Congress, film critic Peter Keough reported – Do we know that it was published by the LoC, or do they just happen to be hosting a copy?

Legacy:

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  • among various owners for several years & by various individuals over time – The reader already knows that time passed.
  • the world's most valuable film memorable – I don't think "memorable" can be used in place of "memorabilia".
  • Was Warner's dress sold in 1981 or in 2012? This is confusing, and it might help if it was in chronological order.
  • lecturer Matt Ripa unsuspectingly found the dress – "unsuspectingly" can be cut without changing the meaning
  • Leaving for now. I would argue that "unsuspectingly" helps readers understand that Ripa wasn't actively searching for the dress, and just happened to run into it unsuspectingly. Usually, when someone "finds" something, it's because they were looking for something to find.--Changedforbetter (talk) 02:54, 6 September 2023 (UTC)[reply]
  • In note 4, some context could be added stating explicitly that the Kardashian incident added to the discussion.
  • It's up to you, but since there's so much info about it, we might consider putting the paragraphs about the Catholic University dress under their own level four heading.

In addition to these notes, I made a few minor copyedits.

Verifiable with no original research
  • The New York Post is generally unreliable and should not be used as a source.
  • The Forbes article is written by a "contributor", which on Forbes means someone who is not part of Forbes staff. These are generally unreliable.
  • There's no consensus as to whether Biography.com is reliable. It might be a good idea to remove it.
  • and deemed an urban legend among staff and students, despite existing photographs of Hartke with the dress. – Comparing the existence of the photos to the urban legend status is WP:SYNTH, because it tries to create a new fact that isn't stated in either Solly (2022) or Zimmermann (2021). This is an interesting contradiction, but we need a source that explicitly describes this contradiction.

These don't matter for GA, but they're also worth pointing out:

  • There are less academic or journalistic sources and more "popular" sources. This is inevitable to some extent with certain subject matter, but it's always better to replace these with more serious sources when possible. HowStuffWorks, Mental Floss, and Nerdist in particular stand out as examples.
  • I notice that the sources are all archived, even the ones that don't need to be archived like Google Books, and all of them are set to "dead" so that the archive link comes first.
  • Ironically, one of the few sources not archived, Wickman (2013), actually is dead.

Spot checks:

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  • Durn (2022): The university contacted the Smithsonian National Museum of American History, who authenticated the garment by comparing its unique characteristics to those of other verified Dorothy dresses, namely a hidden pocket. – Does the source support this? I see where it mentions the pocket, but not that it used it to authenticate the dress. I also don't see anything about the university contacting the Smithsonian.
  • McKean (2013): He made approximately 8–10 different prototypes of the dress before settling on its final checked design, which resembled the outfit Baum described in his novel – It doesn't support this besides comparing it to the novel.
  • Puente (2015): After completing The Wizard of Oz, MGM either recycled most of Dorothy's dresses or re-used them in subsequent films – My understanding of this is that reusing them in subsequent films was the recycling, not that they were two different fates of the dresses.
  • Velasco (2021): Prior to 1939, the textile had mostly been appreciated by the working class for its comfort, durability, and affordability – This source doesn't really support this.
  • Reid (2021): It was copied and sold by retail chains and department stores, with imitations appearing in fashion magazines and sewing patterns from the period is close paraphrasing of Dorothy Gale's dress was copied and sold by retail chains and department stores in America after the film's release in 1939. Imitations can also be seen in fashion magazines and sewing patterns of the period. Also, is Reid really the editor of the Luminaries?

The spot checks brought up a few issues. It may be worth checking over the sourcing to make sure that the sources generally correspond to the statements they're supposed to support.

Broad in its coverage

History, design, and cultural significance are all covered.

Neutral

No ideas are given undue weight. The article does not use subjective language.

Stable

No recent disputes. It will likely need an update in the near future as current events relating to the recently discovered dress are resolved, but this shouldn't significantly affect the current information in the article.

Illustrated

All of the images are public domain and have relevant captions.

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.