Talk:Gentle on My Mind/GA1
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Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 10:52, 16 January 2022 (UTC)
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Over a month old and another review for the GAN backlog drive! --K. Peake 10:52, 16 January 2022 (UTC)
- Nice working with you again!--GDuwenHoller! 19:15, 17 January 2022 (UTC)
- Same to you for sure! --K. Peake 21:13, 17 January 2022 (UTC)
Infobox and lead
[edit]- The body only sources the title as being "Washing Machine", plus where have you got the year from?
- Shouldn't a release date be sourced in the body and used here for original artist John Hatford (year only if nothing else is known), or add a note about what version was really released?
- WP:OVERLINK of John Hartford under songwriter(s)
- Remove RCA Records from the opening sentence since that is mentioned later on and instead add "for his second studio album, Earthwords & Music (1967)" with the wikilink
- Add a second sentence about how Hartford composed the song
- The third sentence should instead be the one about the song being released in 1967 as a single by Hartford, but source this in the body
- Follow the above with one about the lyrical content
- "It was later popularized by Glen Campbell," → "It ended up being popularized by Campbell," making this the sentence after the Grammys
- "The song then caught the attention of Campbell, who" → "The song caught the attention of Glenn Campbell after release; he" at the start of the second para
- Lowercase the Wrecking Crew per MOS:THEMUSIC
- Pipe Hot Country Singles to Hot Country Songs
- "by several artists including" → "by several artists, including"
- Remove the Elvis Presley version from the lead per lack of notability and add a comma before and for correct grammar
- "and was also" → "It was also" as a new sentence, but add some examples here
- Lowercase the Band Perry
- The entire title is not detailed by the article source, but it appears on the B-side of the 7" single. Since the infobox is considered a citation in of itself, I wrote the entire title.
- I've used the Cashbox review as a citation to clarify that the recording actually came out in May. The Cashbox review is from May 6, and there is also this Billboard piece from the exact same day that it details his touring to promote the single
- Rest of the points also done.--GDuwenHoller! 20:49, 18 January 2022 (UTC)
- Thanks for clarifying the B-side part and you are correct in stating the infobox itself can work as a source, also good job on the Cashbox ref; the Billboard piece can be added there as an additional citation. --K. Peake 09:27, 19 January 2022 (UTC)
Writing and original recording
[edit]- Add the release year of the film
- "Inspired by the film's love story depicted in the movie" → "Inspired by love story depicted in the film"
- "in between 20 and" → "in around 20 or"
- Pipe drifter to Vagrancy
- "She questioned Hartford" → "She questioned John Hartford" per MOS:SAMESURNAME
- What part(s) of the last three sentences is [4] being used for, exactly?
- "In 1992, Hartford" → "12 years later, Hartford" to avoid starting two consecutive sentences with the same word
- "to the film, and said the content is" → "to Doctor Zhivago, and said the content was"
- "Hartford described the composition" → "He described the composition"
- Wikilink banjo
- Pipe chorus to Refrain
- "At the time" specify what this is referring to, as you are beginning a new para here
- "who took it to" → "who took the demo to"
- "to sell them but" → "to sell them, but"
- "to the songwriter should use" → "to the songwriter to use"
- Why is there no Good Old Electric in brackets next to "Washing Machine" here like you have done in the infobox; same about 1943?
- Around this point, mention when the original was released
- Should flipside be piped to A-side and B-side?
- Pipe country to Country music
- "undert its "Best Bets", and it forecasted on its review" → "under their "Best Bets"; the magazine forecasted in a review"
- I didn't include the year of the film because of its use at the beginning of the sentence, as it came out that same year (and it would read a little awkward, at least to me).
- [4] is used to mention the part that they divorced, as well as the divorce being one of the reasons he wrote the song. In [3], his former wife mentions that she was suspicious that their relationship was part of the inspiration. So I would say one source completes the other to give us a more consistent picture.
- The source refers to it just as "Washing Machine", but it appears on the record label with the full name. I could add it, but if so I would have to add another citation to the single itself or something along those lines.--GDuwenHoller! 19:44, 20 January 2022 (UTC)
Glenn Campbell's recording and success
[edit]- Wikilink Glenn Campbell on the img text
- "At the time Campbell" → "At the time, Campbell"
- Lowercase the Wrecking Crew per MOS:THEMUSIC
- "slight production arrangements" → "slight production arrangements that"
- "Hot Country Songs[23] and" → "Hot Country Songs,[23] and"
- "to the pop music market." → "to the pop market." with the pipe
- Add info to the audio sample text about the comp at the beginning
- Remove excess space between the comma and [29]
- The categories Hartford's version won should come before which ceremony this was at, though the others are fine since you use "as well as"
- "of 50 artists had recorded covers of "Gentle on my Mind"," → "50 artists had recorded covers of "Gentle on My Mind","
- "sold 600,000 singles." → "had sold 600,000 singles."
- Either add more info or remove the Elvis Presley version per WP:SONGCOVER
- Add a comma before the usage of and
- "the Billboard Hot 100 and at 50" → "the Billboard Hot 100 and at number 50"
- Write out the chart numbers for Dean Martin's version per MOS:NUM
- "and at number 9 on" → "and number 9 on"
- Well, I think the info about Presley's version is now enough to keep it. There's the Felton Jarvis connection (most likely why it was recorded, together with the success of Aretha Franklin's), and the fact that he lost his voice after that recording. Makes sense when you hear his version (and the fact that bibliography happens to comment on the fact that his voice sounded a little rougher, and that it contributed to give the song a bit of a special atmosphere). I don't think the latter part is too relevant for this article, as we can leave it to the reader and just stick to the facts.--GDuwenHoller! 21:29, 20 January 2022 (UTC)
Legacy
[edit]- "In 1984," → "14 years later," to avoid starting too many sentences with in
- "radio in the United States." → "radio in the US." per MOS:US
- "1992 list of" → "1992 list of the" plus only keep this sentence as beginning with "it" if you mean Campbell's version
- "placed it at" → "placed the version at" or "placed the song at", depending on if this is Campbell's version or the original
- "in the United States behind" → "in the US, behind"
- Lowercase the Beatles per MOS:THEMUSIC and add the release year of the song
- Lowercase the Band Perry
- "on the Hot Country Songs charts." → "on Hot Country Songs."
- "increased by 6,000%." → "increased by over 6,000%." per the source
- "digital download figure" → "digital downloads figure"
Accolades
[edit]- The ref col should not be sortable
- Pipe the first instance of Grammy Awards to 10th Annual Grammy Awards and the second to 57th Annual Grammy Awards
Charts
[edit]John Hatford
[edit]- Weekly chart performance → Weekly chart performance of
Glenn Campbell
[edit]- Scrap the year col because the years listed are two consecutive ones; add (1967-68) in brackets instead
- Make the peak position col sortable
- There should be an organization in brackets for the Australia chart; maybe it is Australian Music Report (Kent)?
- Per my previous comment about the years being consecutive, only keep the overall peaks for Hot 100 and Hot Country Songs
- I would in this case keep the distinction between the two years since one relates to the original release, while the second one of 68' was a re-release that was a consequence to the success of "By the Time I Get to Phoenix".--GDuwenHoller! 21:49, 20 January 2022 (UTC)
Other artists
[edit]- Remove the Billboard Hot 100 position for Dean Martin, as 103 is not a correct one even if it reached the Bubbling Under chart that is logged separately from the former
- If the above version reached number 3 on the Bubbling Under Hot 100 Singles chart, then change to that instead of 103 because this chart is separate from the Hot 100
- Seems like I can't account for the chart. The source is gone, and I don't find it at the time on Billboard magazine archival issues. I'll remove it for the time being to restore it in case I can locate a proper source.--GDuwenHoller! 19:55, 21 January 2022 (UTC)
References
[edit]- Copyvio score looks solid as rock at 14.5%!!!
- Ref 24 should be cited as a source like the other citations that aren't from the chart table
- Country Ameria staff 1992 → Country America staff 1992 on ref 51
- Pipe The State to The State (newspaper) and wikilink Newspapers.com (on the first instance)
- Wikilink Associated Press on the first instance
- Wikilink Skyhorse Publishing on the first instance
- Pipe Billboard to Billboard (magazine) and wikilink Google Books on their first instances
- Pipe BMI to Broadcast Music, Inc.
- Wikilink Rolling Stone'
- Wikilink Chicago Review Press
- Wikilink Simon & Schuster
- Pipe Villard Books to Villard (imprint)
- Pipe Cashbox to Cashbox (magazine)
- Pipe Advance Local Media to Advance Publications
- Country Ameria staff → Country America staff
- Wikilink Los Angeles Times
- Pipe The Atlanta Constitution to The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
- Wikilink Rowman & Littlefield
- Wikilink Green Bay Press-Gazette
- Pipe Miller Freeman Books to Miller Freeman, Inc.
- Wikilink The Tennessean on the first instance
- Pipe The Wichita Beacon to The Wichita Eagle
- Wikilink University of California Press
- Wikilink New York Daily News
- Pipe IRMA to Irish Recorded Music Association
- Wikilink Wesleyan University Press
- Wikilink Telegram & Gazette
- Pipe Faber & Faber to Faber and Faber
- Wikilink St. Louis Post-Dispatch
- Wikilink Oxford University Press
- Pipe The Official UK Charts Company to Official Charts Company
- Wikilink ABC-Clio
- Wikilink Reuters
- Wikilink Omnibus Press
- Pipe Record Research to Joel Whitburn
External links
[edit]- Mention that the lyrics are on John Hartford's website
Final comments and verdict
[edit]On hold until everything has been resolved; sorry if that was not as fast as in the past! --K. Peake 10:20, 18 January 2022 (UTC)
- @Kyle Peake: Alright, it took a while longer for me to assess the points this time too. But that should do it.--GDuwenHoller! 21:11, 24 January 2022 (UTC)
- GDuwen Very good job but I have two concerns remaining: why is there no organization in brackets for the Australian chart and shouldn't you split the chart years for Campbell's version into two tables? --K. Peake 08:20, 25 January 2022 (UTC)
- @Kyle Peake: There you go. I didn't see any need to separate the Campbell charts in two tables, but anyhow, it doesn't do any harm either.--GDuwenHoller! 19:01, 25 January 2022 (UTC)
- GDuwen ✓ Pass now, I made the charts suggestion because it is awkward having a chart twice in a table and users should be able to sort through the positions separately for the years, also I did fix the alignment since the chart names were centered too. --K. Peake 21:19, 25 January 2022 (UTC)
- @Kyle Peake: Thanks once again for a quick and objective review, much appreciated.--GDuwenHoller! 21:49, 25 January 2022 (UTC)
- GDuwen ✓ Pass now, I made the charts suggestion because it is awkward having a chart twice in a table and users should be able to sort through the positions separately for the years, also I did fix the alignment since the chart names were centered too. --K. Peake 21:19, 25 January 2022 (UTC)
- @Kyle Peake: There you go. I didn't see any need to separate the Campbell charts in two tables, but anyhow, it doesn't do any harm either.--GDuwenHoller! 19:01, 25 January 2022 (UTC)
- GDuwen Very good job but I have two concerns remaining: why is there no organization in brackets for the Australian chart and shouldn't you split the chart years for Campbell's version into two tables? --K. Peake 08:20, 25 January 2022 (UTC)