Talk:Forever Pop (song)/GA1
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[edit]The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Reviewer: (CA)Giacobbe (talk · contribs) 17:41, 5 June 2021 (UTC)
I like Lil Tjay, haven't heard this song though. Giacobbe talk 17:41, 5 June 2021 (UTC)
GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not) |
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Lead
[edit]- "
February 19, 2020
" should have a comma after 2020. - "
Pop Smoke's song "Like Me" which
" should have a comma after "Like Me".
Background and release
[edit]- "
one of whom was wearing a ski mask and carrying a handgun
" Can you help me understand the relevance of this part? Was this individual the 15yo boy who killed Pop Smoke?
- I have removed the ski mask part, But it is important to keep the part about the handgun because Pop Smoke was shot and killed because a 15-year-old did not want to lose to him
- "
left side of his chest but
" should have a comma after chest.
Music and lyrics
[edit]- "
Pop Smoke's song "Like Me" which
" should have a comma after "Like Me". - "
Alex Griffin for GRM Daily mentions the song has a "melodic and wavy tune delivered in his distinctive style, in a tone that takes no shame in putting his pain on full display"
" This is worded strangely to me; "tune" is a synonym for song, no? It's like saying: "the song has a 'melodic and wavy song'..." I'd recommend changing to "mentions the song is delivered in Lil Tjay's "distinctive" style and tone which "takes no shame in putting his pain on full display".
" You can always move the melodic and wavy bit to beef up the critical reception area.
Critical reception
[edit]- "
track as a "heartfelt record" while
" should have a comma after "heartfelt record", since you are combining two reviews into one sentence.
References
[edit]- Looks good.
- Copyvio score is at 52.2%, which is high, but you have properly sourced and attributed the material used to its respective author. So no worries.
Other
[edit]- Per GA criteria 6, I think an image of Pop Smoke would be appropriate for inclusion.
- I tried including an image of Pop Smoke earlier when I created an article but JJMC89 removed it saying it didn't add anything to the article [1].
- @Shoot for the Stars: I think it would add value, as the song is dedicated to Pop Smoke. GA criteria doesn’t demand the inclusion of photos, so it’s not a dealbreaker, but I would support its inclusion! Giacobbe talk 00:54, 6 June 2021 (UTC)
- (CA)Giacobbe I have added an image.
- @Shoot for the Stars: I think it would add value, as the song is dedicated to Pop Smoke. GA criteria doesn’t demand the inclusion of photos, so it’s not a dealbreaker, but I would support its inclusion! Giacobbe talk 00:54, 6 June 2021 (UTC)
- I tried including an image of Pop Smoke earlier when I created an article but JJMC89 removed it saying it didn't add anything to the article [1].
Suggestions (non-GA criteria)
[edit]Since the GA criteria only covers the bare minimum five MOS guidelines, these are merely suggestions to improve the article and will not affect the outcome of the review.
- Per MOS:CURLY, all apostrophes and should be straight, not curly. Only saw this occur in the 'Critical reception' section.
- It's always nice to have an audio sample. If you need help, I can get you one.
- Can you help me with that? I don't know how to put an audio sample up.
- I noticed some of the references are not archived.
- Done
- (CA)Giacobbe thanks a lot for the review! Let me know if anything else needs to be fixed. You know I'm shooting for the stars, aiming for the moon 💫 (talk) 23:35, 5 June 2021 (UTC)
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.