Talk:Félix Trinidad/GA1

GA Review

Lead

"He debuted as a professional when he was seventeen years old" Numbers above ten are generally in numerals per WP:MOSNUM.
- Corrected. - Caribbean~H.Q. 06:25, 26 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
"In 2008, he returned to the ring to fight Roy Jones." What happened in the fight?
- Added detail. - Caribbean~H.Q. 06:25, 26 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Early years

"Félix Trinidad was born in Fajardo, Puerto Rico, to Irma García and Félix Trinidad Senior. During his childhood the family moved to Cupey Alto, a subdivision of San Juan, Puerto Rico, where he grew up." Do you have a reference for this?
- Which particular part are you suggesting we source? His parents can be sourced with this article, his birth place and being raised in Cupey can be found in virtually all his profiles. - Caribbean~H.Q. 06:16, 26 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  - If you have a reference for it, just add it in. It's better to have too many references than too few. Peanut4 (talk) 01:48, 27 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    - Ok, both added. - Caribbean~H.Q. 20:35, 27 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
"Trinidad compiled a record of fifty-one wins and six losses with twelve knockout victories." See above.
- Corrected. - Caribbean~H.Q. 06:25, 26 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
"The dispute between the boxer and the amateur federation began when the organization's president insisted that Trinidad move out of the 126 pound division in order to open a slot in the roster of the Puerto Rican National Team that was traveling to the Olympics games taking place in Barcelona, Spain." Needs a reference.
- Sourced. - Caribbean~H.Q. 06:25, 26 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Professional career

"At this stage of his career Trinidad competed against with more experienced boxers." "against with" makes no sense.
- Corrected. - Caribbean~H.Q. 06:46, 26 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
"In the second round the champion's condition appeared" Phrases such as "in the second round" should be followed by a comma.
- Comma added to this and a similar instance. - Caribbean~H.Q. 06:46, 26 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Scorelines should use endashes, per WP:DASH.
- Done. - Caribbean~H.Q. 07:26, 26 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
"In the second round Carr scored a knockdown, product of a quick right hand punch." Needs re-writing.
- Removed the "right hand" part, ""punch" should be clear. - Caribbean~H.Q. 06:46, 26 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  - I was more concerned about the second clause which is a fragment clause and doesn't make any sense to me. Peanut4 (talk) 01:50, 27 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    - I have seen similar sentences being used in fight reviews, but there might be some boxing lingo in it, so I'm removing it. - Caribbean~H.Q. 20:35, 27 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
      - I think you misunderstood me. It was that it was boxing jargon, it was because it wasn't correct English. I've readded the details, but tried to simplify it - I hope it's still correct. Peanut4 (talk) 21:56, 28 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
"On the morning of September 11, terrorists attacked the World Trade Center, following this incident the fight was postponed indefinitely." Run-on sentence.
- Broke in two. - Caribbean~H.Q. 06:46, 26 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
A couple of dates aren't wikilinked. Currently policy states linking of dates isn't necessary. But it does need to be consistent.
- I might be that its late and I'm sleepy, but my search didn't find any obvious dates unliked, there are standalone days or years (i.e. 1999 and September 11) but no complete ones, I believe only those are linked but with all the changes going around... If you can point me towards any I will fix them. - Caribbean~H.Q. 07:26, 26 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
"Following this contest Trinidad announced his retirement, at the moment leaving the sport with a record of 41 wins, one defeat, and thirty-four wins by knockout." Reference?
- Sourced. - Caribbean~H.Q. 07:12, 26 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
"Early in the first round Mayorga was on the offensive connecting several combinations, later in the round Trinidad connected some punches to his opponent's face who reacted by displaying a defiant attitude and lowering his defense, which Trinidad used to connect several combinations in the round's closing seconds." Run-on sentence. Also very long. Consider re-writing.
- Split and rewritten. - Caribbean~H.Q. 06:46, 26 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  - Better, but "Early in the first round Mayorga was on the offensive connecting several combinations, later in the round Trinidad connected some punches to his opponent's face." still has two main verbs. Perhaps even just change the comma for a semi-colon to try and stress the emphasis better. Peanut4 (talk) 01:52, 27 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
"Trinidad announced a comeback on March 2, 2004." Why did he decide to come out of retirement?
- None of the reports actually go into that detail, he most likely did it because a regional title was in play, making it easier to secure a better ranking following the fight. But I rather not enter in speculation. - Caribbean~H.Q. 07:12, 26 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
"Following this fight, Trinidad retired temporarily." Again a reference? Why temporary? Why did he come out of retirement again?
- Added some material covering why he retired; acording to his wife he returned due to his "passion" towards the sport, but Trinidad himself has only said that he wasn't returning for money. - Caribbean~H.Q. 07:12, 26 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]

A bit to do, but I'll put it on hold. Peanut4 (talk) 22:28, 25 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]

I'm on it. - Caribbean~H.Q. 06:16, 26 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]

You also need to check the note on the talk page about the years in the references. Peanut4 (talk) 22:56, 26 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Simplified the links, that fixed the date format in the references. - Caribbean~H.Q. 01:24, 27 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Number MOS

Endashes in scorelines should be unspaced e.g. 117–109, per WP:MOSNUM.
- Done. - Caribbean~H.Q. 02:23, 27 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Numerals and units should be broken by non-breaking spaces, e.g. 41 wins, again per WP:MOSNUM. Peanut4 (talk) 01:46, 27 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
- Did it twice, I believe those are the only instances of such combinations. - Caribbean~H.Q. 02:23, 27 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Another question. You've change "country" to "archipelago" twice? Is there any specific reason? I would suggest people would understand the former much better. Peanut4 (talk) 01:54, 27 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Puerto Rico has dynamic politics, the current trends are suggesting that a change in status may be at hand. Parties are redefining their ideals, allying with independent movements, etc. Thus, to reduce the amount of articles needing revisionism if such a thing happens it may be better to keep politics out of articles dealing with sports. - Caribbean~H.Q. 02:10, 27 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]
- I still think it should say "country" - something to think about? Peanut4 (talk) 21:56, 28 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for criteria)

It is reasonably well written.
a (prose): b (MoS):
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects): b (focused):
It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias:
It is stable.
No edit wars etc.:
It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall:
Pass/Fail:

It meets all the GA critiera. I would suggest seeing what you could do to try and get it towards FAC. Beforehand though, I would suggest you put it through a peer review, and hopefully get some both boxing and non-boxing editors to ensure it doesn't have too much jargon or too many details in. I would also suggest some form of copy-edit, but it certainly meets the prose levels for GA. Also, maybe an image or two more might be a good idea, if you can find some.

Well done though, and all the best with the future of the article. Peanut4 (talk) 21:59, 28 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]

I may try pushing it over the FA line once Tito retires (for real), in the meanwhile I will keep it updated and clean like its done with my other boxing GAs. Kudos to you for a fast and efficient work, finding that a review was underway less than a day after the nomination really surprised me, cheers. - Caribbean~H.Q. 01:40, 29 August 2008 (UTC)[reply]