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GA Review

[edit]

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Reviewer: Ceranthor (talk · contribs) 18:25, 27 July 2018 (UTC)[reply]


I'll review this. ceranthor 18:25, 27 July 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Working on the review. Will try to post it ASAP. ceranthor 23:30, 5 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Lead
  • "within the Andes Mountains" - why within rather than just in?
  • " 4,320 meters" - conversion?
  • "Various etymologies have been proposed for the system, including "oven" but also "grandfather"." - vague; what do you mean to say?
  • "It was prospected over the last century for the potential of geothermal power production, but such a project was discontinued after a major incident in 2009." - need to describe it more specifically than just vague "incident"
Done. Jo-Jo Eumerus (talk, contributions) 15:31, 7 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Name and research history
  • worth mentioning that Kunza is extinct language? I think so
  • otherwise fine.
I don't think it's particularly relevant here. Jo-Jo Eumerus (talk, contributions) 15:31, 7 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Geomorphology and geography
  • "El Tatio lies in the Antofagasta Province of northern Chile close to the border between Chile and Bolivia,[9][a] 80 kilometres (50 mi) north of the town San Pedro de Atacama and 100 kilometres (62 mi) east of the town of Calama.[11] " - too long; split into two?
  • "Towns close to El Tatio are Toconce in the north, Caspana in the west and Machuca in the south." - "to the...X" instead of "in the...X" for all three mentioned here
  • "n 1959, a workers' camp for a sulfur mine at Volcan Tatio was the only habitation close to the geothermal field.[13]" - seems a bit out of place; maybe move around or get a better transition?
  • "There are several unpaved roads and all parts of the field are easily reachable from each other,[14] and the old Inca trail from San Pedro de Atacama to Siloli crossed the geyser field;[3] the Inca also operated a mountain sanctuary on Volcan Tatio.[15]" - second half of first sentence should be its own sentence, but keep the semicolon and everything after it in that second sentence
  • link Central Volcanic Zone
  • "while the Sierra de Tucle lies southwest of it.[17]" - instead of "southwest of it", "lies to the southwest"
  • " moraines testify to their existence.[27] A large moraine complex," - link moraine twice in super close proximity
  • "The Rio Salado has its headwaters in the field[8] and is joined by the Rio Tucle within the El Tatio geothermal field, and it drains most of the hot spring water;[30][31] " - rephrase so that it's more clear the Rio Salado drains the springs
  • "temperatures of 17–32 °C (63–90 °F) have been recorded in the water flowing to the Rio Salado.[23]" - super passive voice; rephrase
I think I got these issues. Jo-Jo Eumerus (talk, contributions) 15:31, 7 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Just a brief start. Will post more comments when I have time later today. ceranthor 14:53, 7 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Geomorphology and geography (cont.)
  • "and is the largest geyser field in the southern hemisphere (the largest in the world are Yellowstone in the United States of America and Dolina Geizerov) with about 8% of all geysers in the world and is (together with Sol de Mañana) the highest geyser field in the world.[34][11]" - too much going on, and perhaps not all necessary (largest in world for example, unless better integrated into the text)
  • "a fairly small height in comparison to Yellowstone or Dolina Geizerov.[41] " - this might be a better option to introduce these as the largest
  • "On a smaller scale, one can find cones, crusts, mollusc-shaped formations and waterfall-like surfaces.[45]" - "on a smaller scale..." is vague
  • "High contents of silica give the waters a blueish colour," - minor, but isn't it "bluish"?
  • "greenish hues are owing to iron bacteria.[47]" - too much passive voice; rephrase
  • How married are you to keeping the bulleted text rather than making it normal prose? Not sure what bulleting really adds
  • Sinter is linked several times though it's already linked earlier in the geo/geo section
  • Pictures are really cool. Nice touch.
Blueish is apparently a spelling variant. Regarding passive voice I was thinking to add some variety. Jo-Jo Eumerus (talk, contributions) 16:41, 8 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Geology
  • "all separated by areas with no recent volcanism" - a more exact timeframe would be useful if available
  • "Had the region been dominated by andesitic volcanism producing lava flows until the late Miocene," - this makes it sound like a hypothetical (it's the "Had"); but I don't think it's meant to read that way
  • Holocene overlinked
Done. Jo-Jo Eumerus (talk, contributions) 16:41, 8 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Climate and biology
  • link monsoon since SA Monsoon lacks an article
  • "The whole Central Andes were wetter in the past, resulting in the formation of lakes such as Lake Tauca in the Altiplano,[25] and together with a colder climate in the development of glaciers at El Tatio which have left moraines.[90] " - not a grammatically correct sentence (particularly second half)
  • Should use an endash for date ranges, not a hyphen
Not sure that I like having a special link for monsoon, I think that most people know what a monsoon is. Jo-Jo Eumerus (talk, contributions) 16:41, 8 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Spring biology
  • Spring biology can be combined as a subsection here I think (under biology)
  • No need to link arsenic again, or UV radiation
  • same with linking life
  • "In splash cones Synechococcus-like microbes are instead responsible for the structures, which resemble these of hot springs.[103]" - "those" not "these" I suspect
  • Integrate bullet point into text
Dunno about the header; to me it sounds like it's so substantial that it merits its own section. Jo-Jo Eumerus (talk, contributions) 16:41, 8 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Geological history
  • "The relative movement of the Tucle horst and Tatio graben that gave rise to both occurred in the Pliocene-Quaternary when the Western Cordillera was subject to extensional tectonics. " - wordy, and I think you need a less complicated topic sentence to start the section
  • Date ranges should use endashes, not hyphens
  • "The Tatio ignimbrite is indurated" - meaning what? jargon-y
  • "Volcan Tatio erupted mafic lavas" - worth clarifying briefly in parentheses what mafic means
I think I got these. Jo-Jo Eumerus (talk, contributions) 18:55, 8 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Human exploitation
  • "and where the heat flow from the interior of the globe is sufficiently high can be used both for heating purposes and for the generation of electrical power." - missing an "it" after "high"
  • " 10,9 gigawatt geothermal energy are produced on Earth" - "10,9"? seems like a typo but unsure
  • "a bidding process for exploration rights in 1978 to attract private companies to El Tatio was interrupted by government changes.[130]" - maybe elaborate just a bit on the details of the government changes?
  • "

The venting created by the blow-out On the 8th September 2009, a drilling well in El Tatio blew out, generating a 60-metre (200 ft) high steam fountain[136] that was not plugged until the 4th October 2009.[137] " - why "the" before both dates?

  • "The project had already earlier been opposed by the local Atacameno population " - worth noting that they're an indigenous people
  • "march of two women to Santiago to complain about the project.[141] " - not sure "complain" is the best word here
  • "The Geotérmica del Norte company was fined 100 UTM[h] for violating mitigation plans, a fine upheld in 2011 by the Court of Appeals in Santiago.[143]" - worth explaining what UTM means, or converting it to another currency?
Source has no details on what government changes other than they happened in 1978 apparently. Replaced "complain" with another word, not sure if it's better. I need a source for "indigenous", seems like. Jo-Jo Eumerus (talk, contributions) 18:55, 8 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Tourism
  • Any update since?
Can't find much recent information that would be topical. Many of the sources are not necessarily reliable either. Jo-Jo Eumerus (talk, contributions) 18:55, 8 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
References
  • Ref 141 - standardize with capitalization for other article titles in references (fix all caps)
  • Same with ref 145
  • Comprehensive sources. And they seem very reliable throughout.
  • Earwig's tool looks good.
Done. Jo-Jo Eumerus (talk, contributions) 18:55, 8 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Images
  • Vivid and sourced properly.
  • Image in "climate and biology" might be moved up; it's creeping into the next section for me on Chrome.
  • Same with warning sign image. Maybe make it smaller?
Worked with {{Clear}} template; not sure if that is the best approach. Jo-Jo Eumerus (talk, contributions) 18:55, 8 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
General
  • Don't overlink epochs or chemicals
  • Use endashes for date ranges

Looks good and super comprehensive. Nice work. ceranthor 15:49, 8 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks, I think I got everything. Apropos of nothing, I wonder if the article in its current state would pass at FAC. Jo-Jo Eumerus (talk, contributions) 18:55, 8 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
@Jo-Jo Eumerus: I'll go ahead and pass. I think the prose needs fine-tuning, but comprehensiveness-wise, I certainly think it is FAC-ready. ceranthor 15:41, 9 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]