Talk:Dust II/GA1
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Reviewer: Slightlymad (talk · contribs) 12:02, 19 April 2018 (UTC)
Will be doing this.
- Some inline citations need minor work; some have no credited authors, others have no work/publisher. Please fill in those missing fields inline. Finally, retitle instances of "reddit", "pcgamer", and Mail Online into Reddit, PC Gamer, and MailOnline, respectively; FN. 15 links to Kotaku, so that should be in the work param.
- Done. Zoom (talk page) 14:33, 19 April 2018 (UTC)
- Would you mind terribly archiving all the sources? We can prevent linkrot for doing this.
- Archived everything I could before your latest suggestions. Zoom (talk page) 15:08, 19 April 2018 (UTC)
- I spot a cite error at FN. 1, please fix. Plus, is there a reason why the other refs are unarchived? Patience, Slightlymad 15:36, 19 April 2018 (UTC)
- Fixed and because of robots.txt. Fixed the non-archived links now. Zoom (talk page) 16:07, 19 April 2018 (UTC)
- I spot a cite error at FN. 1, please fix. Plus, is there a reason why the other refs are unarchived? Patience, Slightlymad 15:36, 19 April 2018 (UTC)
- Archived everything I could before your latest suggestions. Zoom (talk page) 15:08, 19 April 2018 (UTC)
- Period isn't needed in that image caption in Impact and legacy section, as it's an incomplete sentence. Shouldn't Far Cry 5 be italicized?
- Done! Zoom (talk page) 13:04, 19 April 2018 (UTC)
I haven't got to the prose and verifiability yet, so I'll get back to you on those. Patience, Slightlymad 12:02, 19 April 2018 (UTC)
Not sure if the following claims are sourced in the article, but for the sake of maintaining text-source integrity please support them each with citations:
- "Middle" has there are three main areas; Catwalk is an elevated pathway that leads to Short on A site; Lower Tunnels is a tunnel leading from Middle to Upper Tunnels; and Middle Doors (Mid-Doors) has a set of open double doors at Middle, which leads to the Counter-Terrorist's spawn.
- All of the positions are cited at the end of the paragraph. Wouldn't work if I put in the same citation for every single area, since the two citations at the end cover everything. If I need to change this, let me know. Zoom (talk page) 15:21, 19 April 2018 (UTC)
- At Long A, there are another three important areas before approaching the A Site. Long Doors are the two sets of open double doors that lead from the Terrorist's spawn to Long A; Pit is a sloped area where players can hide or use for cover near Long Doors; and Counter-Terrorist spawn, located right of Long A from A Site, is where the Counter-Terrorists spawn. "B Tunnels" has two main areas; Upper Tunnels and Lower Tunnels.
- See last claim. Zoom (talk page) 15:21, 19 April 2018 (UTC)
- In all Counter-Strike games, Dust II has been a popular map since its initial release and as of the 2017 updates continues to receive positive reception from mapmakers and players.
- Rephrased. Zoom (talk page) 15:21, 19 April 2018 (UTC)
- In February 2017, the map was removed from the Active Duty Competitive Pool in Global Offensive, a group of maps played in professional competitions. The map was removed in favor of a revamped version of a map titled Inferno.
- Done. Zoom (talk page) 15:21, 19 April 2018 (UTC)
Patience, Slightlymad 15:06, 19 April 2018 (UTC)
- I think the Design section could be expanded, as it lacks a summary of the creator's design process. You should summarize Johnston's design process documented in his blog (at Fn. 5) in a new paragraph, and maybe signpost it with a topic statement using your own paraphrased version of this text by Johnston, "First things first, I had to ensure that this new map had everything in common with Dust, without actually being Dust. I had to identify the elements that defined a Dust map."
- Done, let me know if there's anything I should change! Zoom (talk page) 14:56, 20 April 2018 (UTC)
- This paragraph is half-baked, and I'm seeing a couple of issues with it (see below). Please take time to review the source properly so that this paragraph will yield better results.
- ...he needed to ensure that this map had much in common with Dust, but not the point of it becoming Dust. → Looks close paraphrased to me; it's almost the same wording from the source.
- He began identifying what made Dust, Dust. → This is confusing.
- He set certain rules for himself with it, to make sure he didn't overuse under-use the feature. → Huh?
- Per MOS:N'T, use of contractions should be avoided in encylopedic writing.
- I fixed what I could of the issue, let me know if anything else comes up. Zoom (talk page) 15:30, 20 April 2018 (UTC)
- This paragraph is half-baked, and I'm seeing a couple of issues with it (see below). Please take time to review the source properly so that this paragraph will yield better results.
- Done, let me know if there's anything I should change! Zoom (talk page) 14:56, 20 April 2018 (UTC)
- Mitch Bowman of PC Gamer praised the 2017 update, stating
the change produced visual clarity. Probably best if we just quote this text directly instead, It’s a healthy overhaul that makes some modest but interesting changes without reinventing the wheel.- Done. Zoom (talk page) 12:27, 20 April 2018 (UTC)
- Zzzoom, whenever you're quoting texts directly from the source, don't forget to enclose them in quotes, because otherwise it may constitute copyright violation. See WP:QUOTE for more on this. Patience, Slightlymad 13:02, 20 April 2018 (UTC)
- Thanks, I accidentally got rid of them while pasting the quote in. Zoom (talk page) 13:06, 20 April 2018 (UTC)
- Zzzoom, whenever you're quoting texts directly from the source, don't forget to enclose them in quotes, because otherwise it may constitute copyright violation. See WP:QUOTE for more on this. Patience, Slightlymad 13:02, 20 April 2018 (UTC)
- Done. Zoom (talk page) 12:27, 20 April 2018 (UTC)
- Another inline citation issue: many sources are missing publication dates, please add. Patience, Slightlymad 04:32, 20 April 2018 (UTC)
Working on it.Done. Zoom (talk page) 12:27, 20 April 2018 (UTC)
Alright, I have no more issues with the article. I did a little copyediting of the prose which should be clean by now, and a spot-check of the cited sources, all of which are reliable and reflect the content accurately. Well done, Pass