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Talk:David of Sassoun (statue)/GA1

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GA Review

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Nominator: Yerevantsi (talk · contribs) 15:53, 29 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Reviewer: Kimikel (talk · contribs) 01:04, 5 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]

Hello, I will be reviewing this article as part of the January GAN drive. Please expect comments from me within the next few days. Kimikel (talk) 01:04, 5 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]

@Yerevantsi: A remarkable statue and a culture about which I'd like to know more. I have left my comments below. Please let me know if you have any questions or concerns regarding my suggestions. Thank you. Kimikel (talk) 18:01, 5 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]

Well-written

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Lead

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  • rock-like basalt > technically speaking basalt is a rock, not rock-like
  • during the one-thousandth > for the thousandth
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • but was removed two years later and Kochar was arrested. but two years later, the statue was destroyed and Kochar was arrested.
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • With decline in train arrivals, > Following a decline in arrivals to Yerevan railway station,

History

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  • the most prominent artist to move to Soviet Armenia from abroad (in 1936) > who in 1936 became the most prominent artist to move to Soviet Armenia from abroad
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • It was made of gypsum, and was reportedly finished in 18 days [5] (other sources state Kochar spent up to three months on the project). > Kochar made it of gypsum and reportedly finished it in 18 days, though other sources state he spent up to three months on the project.
  • the Russian-language academic publication > which one?
plus Added----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • it was positioned > It was positioned
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • , for "anti-Soviet agitation", > remove commas
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • Kochar recreated it, with significant changes from the initial version, which notably included > Kochar recreated it with significant changes from the initial version, which had included
  • restored (current) > current restored
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • , but no senior official > ; no senior officials
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • including literary scholar and writer > including the literary scholar and writer
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • sculptor Grigor > the sculptor Grigor
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • Actor Zhan > The actor Zhan
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • It was erected > The statue was erected
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • (1962), in front > remove comma
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • memorial, erected > memorial erected
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • new trend in statues in Yerevan, where they no longer dominate over people and streets by their formidable height > new trend in statues in Yerevan in which they no longer towered over people and streets with their formidable height.
  • , at the feet of the horse, > remove commas
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • lighting, was > lighting, and was
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]

Description and symbolism

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  • with an overly muscular > with a heavily muscled physique
 Done----Երևանցի talk 13:23, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • "lightning sword"—Tur ketsaki > tur ketsaki ("lightning sword").
 Done----Երևանցի talk 13:23, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • Kochar explained the large size of the horse's tail and the lack of reins and bit with its anthropomorphic and supernatural qualities as narrated in the epic. > Kochar explained that the large size of the horse's tail, its lack of reins and bit, and its anthropomorphic and supernatural qualities were as narrated in the epic.
 Done----Երևանցի talk 13:23, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]

open to "choosing" > open to choosing (not enough of Simyan's work to require quotation marks)

 Done----Երևանցի talk 13:23, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]

trail station building > railway station. (unless you're referring to a different building)

 Done----Երևանցի talk 13:23, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]

pool, from which the epic hero rises, symbolize > pool from which David rises symbolize

 Done----Երևանցի talk 13:23, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]

Reception

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  • For this section, I would recommend adding titles for as many people as possible. "The sculptor Lev Kerbel said XYZ" is more impactful than "Lev Kerbel said XYZ" because it adds context and a degree of authority.
  • which earned him...widely considered Kochar's > which earned Kochar...widely considered his
  • A Communist magazine > A communist magazine
It refers to the party, not the ideology. I've rephrased it to "local Communist Party magazine".----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • acquired an iconic status,[59][60] and: remove comma
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • It has also been widely admired > The statue has also been widely admired
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • and often called as a > and has often been called a
  • Architects Artsvin Grigoryan > The architects Artsvin Grigoryan
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • and compared favorably > and compared it favorably
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • it powerfully reflects> the statue powerfully reflects
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • As early as 1998 Armen Shekoyan > add comma
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • location—now just an ordinary residential area due to the decline in train arrivals—the > location, which had become an ordinary residential area due to the decline in train arrivals,
  • architect Garri Rashidyan > the architect Garri Rashidyan

Notes

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  • Note C: Remove "However" and the comma.
 Done----Երևանցի talk 10:52, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]

Verifiability

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  • The film studio Hayfilm (formerly Armenfilm) uses the statue as its logo., It appeared on a 1968 and 1990 Soviet stamps and a 1991 Soviet commemorative coin., Yerevan Metro tokens depict the statue., and The statue is featured in the 1987 Soviet Armenian film The Road to Sasuntsi Davit [hy]. are all unsourced.
Added ref to Hayfilm logo.----Երևանցի talk 12:09, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • Note A is unsourced.
Added source.----Երևանցի talk 12:09, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • Footnote 26 is the only one that puts the page number in the prose itself. For consistency, I would recommend removing it and putting it in the citation itself, since it's the only page you cite from that source.
 Done----Երևանցի talk 12:09, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]
  • Translations of all of the titles of foreign language sources would be very helpful.
 Done----Երևանցի talk 12:09, 7 January 2025 (UTC)[reply]

Spot check

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  • 19: Verified
  • 61: Verified
  • 88: Verified
  • 25: Verified
  • 17: Verified

Neutrality, broadness, and stability

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  • No issues.

Illustrated

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  • All images are properly tagged and beneficial to the article.
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