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Talk:Cordelia Chase/GA1

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GA Review

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GA review (see here for criteria)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose): b (MoS):
    Generally looks good. I've made some tweaks here and there, but what I noticed in the plot section was that specific episodes were not identified for specific events. For instance, it talks about Cordy dating Xander and then breaking up with him, but it should identify the episodes where these two events take place. It kind of insinuates that these events take place in the same episode. The same goes for the rest of the section. There are some instances where this is done, but it seems to be inconsistent on the page.
    Cordelia dating Xander is a season length arc, not something that occurs within an episode or two. I identified the episode where she breaks up with him though.  Paul  730 23:04, 9 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
    I get that. I meant more like the episode it starts and when it ends (you've covered the later).  BIGNOLE  (Contact me) 23:44, 9 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
    The bit about "The Wish", it isn't followed up and just seems random. I think either explaining the outcome, or just dropping it altogether is necessary.
    Removed "The Wish" info.  Paul  730 23:04, 9 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
    "...a demon causes Cordelia's visions to overwhelm her and upon her recovery,..." - Could this be elaborated on? I don't understand what is meant by "overwhelm her".
    I gave a little more detail, is that more clear?  Paul  730 23:04, 9 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
    Connor, Jake and Trenton Tupen" - ?? I assume two infants portrayed the baby, but is it supposed to be "Jake Connor"?
    They were triplets.  Paul  730 23:04, 9 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
    Quick note: There needs to be a consistent style for the sources. I saw some that were in a citation template and others that were not.
    The quote from Cordy in the characteristics section seems to be being used in an OR fashion. For instance, in Michael Myers (Halloween), the quote from Loomis is there because it's directly linked to what Carpenter had felt when he visited a mental institution. There doesn't appear to be a clear link to any text here. The same for the quote at the end, of Cordy's final appearance. There's nothing, that I could see, that linked to the text to justify why it was there.
    Removed those quotes.  Paul  730 23:04, 9 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects): b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
    I resized the infobox image to more inline with appropriate sizes (which is generally below 400px). I wonder, is there a better image for Cordelia? The one here is a little out of focus. Here is one I found from her Buffy days, though I'm sure there could be others. Just a suggestion.
    That was one of the first decent screenshots I found when Zythe rewrote the article a while back. It was only meant as a temporary replacement for the far inferior image that was currently there. I'll look for another one.  Paul  730 23:04, 9 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:
Something I wanted to point out. I think that there should be more paraphrasing and less direct quotes, or at least smaller chunks. As I was reading I found that where were quotes that were almost a paragraph (or half a paragraph) long. There should be less of a reliance on direct quotes and more on paraphrasing what a person is saying. Sometimes a particular description cannot be paraphrased, but when I was reading there was not a lot of that problem that I could see.  BIGNOLE  (Contact me) 20:58, 25 April 2009 (UTC)[reply]
I took care of the remaining issue (which was identify each of the episodes those plot points were coming from), because it was small. This GAN should have been closed a month ago. But, now that that has been taken care of I can close it.  BIGNOLE  (Contact me) 04:08, 22 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Jeez, I really kept meaning to do this but I've been overworked lately because of Mods exams so thank you very much! ~ZytheTalk to me! 13:51, 26 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]