Talk:Chester Rock Light/GA1
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Reviewer: Zawed (talk · contribs) 08:27, 8 July 2014 (UTC)
This one has been sitting around for a while, so I'll take it. Comments as follows:
Lead
- "The 21 feet (6.4 m) tall...": I think there should be a dash in there, but not sure if it be 21-foot or 21-feet?
- "...Fresnel lens, it was first lit on on July...": suggest rephrasing to "Fresnel lens which was first... There is a repetition of "on" as well.
- "...a skeleton tower and that tower was modified...": suggest rephrasing to "a skeleton tower which was subsequently modified..."
- "In the 1990s, Deep River...": missing a "the"
Construction
- "21 feet (6.4 m)": as above
- "6th order Fresnel lens": it may be helpful to wikilink Fresnel and 6th order (if such a link exists)
- "It was first lit on July 1, 1889, it featured a...": suggest rephrasing to "First lit on July 1, 1889, it featured a..."
- "According the Light List...": missing a "to"
- "A December 1889 report...": what sort of report was it, and who/what commissioned it?
- "The foundation rest...": should be "rests"
- "frustum": wikilink?
- "15 feet (4.6 m)": as above, some other dimensions although I note that you don't need the conversion on second usage of 15-foot
- "with a sixth order Fresnel lens.": this is already mentioned in first paragraph
Skeleton tower
- "the replacement skeletal tower was a pyramidal steel skeleton tower": nearly a close repetition here, I suggest replacing the "skeleton tower" with "structure"
- "The skeleton tower's base was painted white": to avoid the repetition in the adjacent sentences, I suggest rephrasing to "The base of the tower was painted..."
- "and light": missing a "its"
Service
- "with records showing 1911 and 1914.": Not sure what you are trying say here? That the deactivation happened twice, in 1911 and 1914? Doesn't tie in previous statement that it happened in winter (I assume every winter).
- "In 2014, the skeleton tower is now known...": suggest rephrasing to "As of 2014, the skeleton tower is known..."
That's it for now, will check back in a few days. Zawed (talk) 08:27, 8 July 2014 (UTC)
- I just saw this! I'll make changes as soon as I can. Some of them seem to be issues with the template for measurements. Should be easy to clean up, thanks for reviewing. ChrisGualtieri (talk) 05:48, 16 July 2014 (UTC)
- Did the fixes and a few other minor ones. Should be good. ChrisGualtieri (talk) 06:10, 21 July 2014 (UTC)
- Passed as GA. Cheers. Zawed (talk) 08:49, 26 July 2014 (UTC)
- Did the fixes and a few other minor ones. Should be good. ChrisGualtieri (talk) 06:10, 21 July 2014 (UTC)
- I just saw this! I'll make changes as soon as I can. Some of them seem to be issues with the template for measurements. Should be easy to clean up, thanks for reviewing. ChrisGualtieri (talk) 05:48, 16 July 2014 (UTC)