Talk:Cecil E. Harris/GA1
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Reviewer: Krishna Chaitanya Velaga (talk · contribs) 03:21, 16 January 2017 (UTC)
Will take this one. Regards, Krishna Chaitanya Velaga (talk • mail) 03:21, 16 January 2017 (UTC)
- Many thanks! Finktron (talk) 11:01, 20 January 2017 (UTC)
- Lead and infobox;
- Harris's performance is also remarkable for its consistency; consistency in the sense?
- The later paras of the lead doesn't comply with the neutral point of view, it is somewhat as praising the subject, per WP:PUFFERY, here are the cases;
- in "just" four days
- Both feats were rarely if ever repeated by other American aces with similar scores
- Harris's "truncated" tour
- Please reword the similar to these cases.
- Barrett Tillman is unnecessary in the lead, it a bit promoting the subject.
- I would like to see something on post-war and death, in the lead
- In the infobox; 1941–67 to be 1941–1967, per MOS:DATERANGE
- The "Unit" is naval aviation/reserve, not the ships he served, if possible mention the squadrons VF-18, 36, Air Group 18 etc. (the most appropriate)
- Resolved these issues as requested. The only thing I have not complied with is the inclusion of post-war/death info. in the lead. Perhaps mention of Korean War recall and OpNav work merits inclusion, but neither this nor his death were noteworthy enough to make headlines. As such I'm not sure it belongs in the lead. Finktron (talk) 03:05, 28 January 2017 (UTC)
- Section 1;
- Something about parents, if available
- Harris attended Northern State Teachers' College (NTSC); for what, under graduation, graduation, post grad etc.?
- returning to school; which school, Cresbard or NTSC, if it is the latter use "the college" instead of "school"
- Harris had earned his wings; from which academy has he taken the training, mention if available
- skipper?
- This was a feat rarely replicated in U.S. Navy history; the sentence is not supported by the reference cited. Also it is not NPOV, so remove.
- Addressed all of these issues, I believe. Finktron (talk) 03:05, 28 January 2017 (UTC)
- Section 2.2;
- No need to separate column for citations and cite in the "Total" after the counts
- remove the last row, this is completely unnecessary
- To maintain consistency change the date format to "Month Day, Year", ex: January 27, 2017
- Addressed this section. Working through others tonight and over the course of this weekend. Cheers, Finktron (talk) 23:41, 27 January 2017 (UTC)
- Section 2.3.1;
- during any of the day's strikes -> during any of the daytime strikes
- bona fide -> bonafide
- use {{convert}} for "46 tons"
- Air group commander (CAG); the acronym is bracket is irrelevant to the prefixed position, i
- use conversion template for "1-ton", also "50,000 tons"
- A melee ensued. One Zero broke ranks and was chased by Burley; join the sentences
- from 7 o'clock?
- 200 feet (61 m); abbreviate
- Admiral Bogan; mention full name as it is the first name
- all-day air support for Marine landings -> air support throughout the day for marine landings
- four-and-one-half; what is one-half, clarify in a footnote
- Section 2.3.2;
- Fully half; this is awkward, just "half"
- Admiral Gerald F. Bogan; mention using the last name from second mention per MOS:LASTNAME
- 06:17? correct per MOS:TIME
- It
onlytook two minutes - snooper anti-submarine patrol (SNASP), the initialization must be capitals "Snooper Anti-Submarine Patrol (SNASP)"
- Commander-in-Chief; mention in the acronym in braces
- "A" Day?
- abbreviate the units "feet"
- extraordinary heroism during the day's events; "day's" is a bit awkward, reword
- Inconsistency in usage "US Army" "U.S. Navy"
- Section 2.3.3;
- On November 5 and 6 -> On November 5–6
- There inconsitency in mentioning the counts throughout the article, in some cases number figures are used and in other cases, wording is used. Please maintain a fixed format
- was spotted by
CecilHarris - drop on the USS Hancock; italics for "Hancock"
- 1300 hours; format the date per MOS:TIME
- Section 3;
- He also was engaged to his
sweetheartEva at this time - having hanged himself in the interim; why did he hang up? any reason, depression, or something
- He also was engaged to his
- Images:
- File:Cecil E. Harris in the Cockpit.jpg
- File:McCampbell-Harris-Enhanced.jpg
- Both the above don't have valid licenses and permissions
- 11.5% confidence, violation unlikely.
- Regards, Krishna Chaitanya Velaga (talk • mail) 03:53, 27 January 2017 (UTC)
- I believe I've addressed the bulk of your recommendations now and agree with almost all of them. With 24-hour format, 06:17 is correct per MOS:TIME, but I did fix the other example which was wrong. The inconsistency of counts in the article I believe is acceptable per WP:MOSNUM. Larger numbers are rendered in symbols while smaller quantities are typed out in word form, which conforms to acceptable practice. Not to mention I think it reads better even if it is inconsistent.
- Please let me know what the rights problems are with the images, as I believe that is the last major issue facing this article passing GA review. If there are any other fixes that still need addressing please let me know. Thank you for taking the time to review this article. It is already better as a result, I think. Cheers, Finktron (talk) 04:16, 28 January 2017 (UTC)
- I've forwarded an email to Permissions - Wikipedia concerning the McCampbell/Harris image. That picture appears in numerous 1945 newspapers many of which are available online e.g. https://newspapers.lib.utah.edu/details?id=178887 https://texashistory.unt.edu/ark:/67531/metapth256122/m1/2/ http://newspapers.digitalnc.org/lccn/sn91068291/1945-02-01/ed-1/seq-6/ . It is a Navy wartime publicity photo and as such should be in the public domain.
I am also working on obtaining email-confirmed permissions for the infobox image. Cheers, Finktron (talk) 16:29, 28 January 2017 (UTC)
- @Finktron: The image issue is the only concern that remains. Regards, Krishna Chaitanya Velaga (talk • mail) 10:57, 2 February 2017 (UTC)
- @Krishna Chaitanya Velaga: I should have an answer on this by Monday. The image is in a collection held by a library in Harris's home state. They are helping me determine if it is their copyright or an official Navy image. If the latter, I'll switch it for his official 1967 Navy photo portrait. Cheers, Finktron (talk) 12:17, 4 February 2017 (UTC)
- @Krishna Chaitanya Velaga: I went ahead and changed the infobox image to one that's confirmed an official US Navy source per the collection from which it originates at Northern State University. I also added more information to the "Leading Hellcat Aces" photo to help shore up its Navy origins. Please let me know if this is enough to pass GA review. I've attempted to be quite thorough. Cheers, Finktron (talk) 00:28, 5 February 2017 (UTC)
- @Finktron: The image issue is the only concern that remains. Regards, Krishna Chaitanya Velaga (talk • mail) 10:57, 2 February 2017 (UTC)
- It is reasonably well written.
- It is factually accurate and verifiable.
- a (reference section):
b (citations to reliable sources):
c (OR):
d (copyvio and plagiarism):
- a (reference section):
- It is broad in its coverage.
- a (major aspects):
b (focused):
- a (major aspects):
- It follows the neutral point of view policy.
- Fair representation without bias:
- Fair representation without bias:
- It is stable.
- No edit wars, etc.:
- No edit wars, etc.:
- It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
- a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales):
b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales):
- Overall:
- Pass/Fail:
- Regards, Krishna Chaitanya Velaga (talk • mail) 14:21, 7 February 2017 (UTC)
- Pass/Fail: