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Talk:Cameron Rahles-Rahbula/GA1

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GA Review

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Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Jaguar (talk · contribs) 17:11, 9 April 2014 (UTC)[reply]

I'll take up this review as part of the chain of Paralympians submitted in past few days. I mainly focus on copy editing issues. Given the size of these articles the GAR itself should not take too long so I will leave down some initial comments on these articles within 48 hours. Thanks! Jaguar 17:11, 9 April 2014 (UTC)[reply]

GA review – see WP:WIAGA for criteria

  1. Is it reasonably well written?
    A. Prose quality:
    B. MoS compliance for lead, layout, words to watch, fiction, and lists:
  2. Is it factually accurate and verifiable?
    A. References to sources:
    It is well referenced.
    B. Citation of reliable sources where necessary:
    C. No original research:
  3. Is it broad in its coverage?
    A. Major aspects:
    B. Focused:
  4. Is it neutral?
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. Is it stable?
    No edit wars, etc:
  6. Does it contain images to illustrate the topic?
    A. Images are copyright tagged, and non-free images have fair use rationales:
    B. Images are provided where possible and appropriate, with suitable captions:
  7. Overall:
    Pass or Fail:

Initial comments

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Lead

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  • The lead is looking more fleshed out compared to the other Paralympian articles. It explains the article and the prose is good - I see no copyediting issues here!
  • The lead complies per WP:LEAD and the GA criteria.

Personal

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  • "He is married to Emily and they have a son Archie." - sounds a bit too informal here. If the information is possible, what is her last name and when were they married (not a requirement of GA, of course! But this sentence does seem informal)
  • "He went to Timbertop, for a year" - for readers unfamiliar to this (and me!), what is Timbertop referring to? I read about it and found it is a campus but this sentence doesn't explain what its function is.

Career

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  • "At the 2009 IPC Alpine Skiing World Championships in High Resort 1, Korea he won a gold medal in the Men's Slalom Standing " - this doesn't seem to make sense. "High Resort 1, Korea he won a gold medal"? I don't know what to suggest as I'm not sure what this means! Is Korea referring to the country of the Korean team? Did he win the gold medal in Korea?

On hold

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This article has the least problems than any of Paralympian articles I've reviewed so far - there a little and only very minor issues I have found with this article. The lead complies per the GA criteria and once those minor copy editing issues have been addressed to this article should pass the GAN with little problems. The prose is generally good for this article too. I'll put this on hold until those issues have been clarified. Thank you! Jaguar 20:23, 15 April 2014 (UTC)[reply]


Close - promoted

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Thank you very much for addressing those points so quickly. The article has definitely improved since the GA review, all references are fine, the prose has improved and the sections now meet the GA criteria. It has speedily passed the GAN. Thanks! Jaguar 19:57, 18 April 2014 (UTC)[reply]