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Untitled

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Copy edit

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I recently copy edited this article, but my edits were reverted. The latest version still has some punctuation and grammar errors which were re-introduced with the revert. Would anyone mind me fixing the punctuation and grammar mistakes? Best — Mr. Stradivarius 01:25, 9 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks! I don't know about my copy edit being perfect, but I'm glad that you agree to include it. Though it may look as if I removed a whole section, I really only removed the section heading, plus the sentence about Jha's books. My reason for removing the "summary" heading is because the lead section is already supposed to be a summary of the article, so at the moment we actually have two summary sections. I thought one summary section would be enough. :) Of course, we could always think of a different heading name, like "aims", or "history", etc. — Mr. Stradivarius 13:34, 9 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Where this article is like an advert

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This article needs the following removed/improved to remove its non-neutral tone. The following would be fine on the school's own website, but Wikipedia should be concentrating on actual facts, rather than notional ideals, about the school.


  • "with a mission to take English to the lowest strata of Indian society" - Talk of the school having a "mission" is grandiose. Neutrally is has "aims" and "purposes".
  • " and soft skills besides running capacity building programmes in India." - What does this mean? "Soft skills"? What is a "capacity building programme"?
  • "It endeavours to take English.." - Neutrally we would say that it simply teaches English. Talk of it "endeavouring" is offering the opinion to the reader that what they do is difficult.
  • "ensure that what bounties English has to offer must percolate down even through the lower strata of soiciety." - Overblown editorialising. Also contains a typo and grammatically suspect.
  • "teach the English language to the common people in a short period, so that they would be able to share their talents to develop the society" - Who are the "common people"? Who's to say what benefit society may, or may not, get from their talents? Really, this reads like a political manifesto. Not a factual description of what the school does.
  • "For the learning of the English language, Jha has written many books. His latest book on personal growth Celebrate Your Life is for both teachers and students alike." - Grammatically clumsy. How many books is "many" is a matter of opinion. Is that 5, 10 or 100? Using "alike" is poor tone, suggesting an opinion about the quality of writing. But what does this have to do with the school? Is this not more relevant to Jha's own article?
  • "As the project students have been trained in spoken English Skills besides grooming their personality." - I have no idea what this means. Is it saying that the school produces groomed personalities? Would that not be a matter of opinion?
  • "The government of Delhi also took services of British Lingua during the commonwealth Games in order to train in Spoken English and Behavioural skills to the Delhi Home Guards." - Grammatically makes no sense.

--Escape Orbit (Talk) 22:38, 27 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Since I got no reply to the above, I've implemented changes regarding what I identified as being non-neural tone. --Escape Orbit (Talk) 17:00, 19 April 2014 (UTC)[reply]