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Talk:Body Talk Pt. 2/GA1

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GA Review

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Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Novice7 (talk) 16:59, 17 April 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I'll be reviewing this article. Novice7 (talk) 16:59, 17 April 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Very good work Pancake! Here are a few comments:

  • DAB/EL Check:
    • No DAB
    • A dead link and a few redirects: [1]

Lead

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  • Robyn started working on songs for the album [..] still in the works – though they're not connected her, "working" and "work" are redundant. Please change it.
  • classic single – I suppose it's Single (music). If so, link it.
  • In the United States, it peaked at number forty-one, becoming Robyn's highest position on the chart. The album charted moderately elsewhere, reaching number one in Denmark and number three in Norway. – number one is not a moderate success. Also, arrange the chart performance according to the chart success. Sweden -> Denmark -> Norway and then US.
  • Can you include the year Body Talk Pt. 1 was released in brackets?

Background

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  • Year after Robyn.

*Since Robyn is from Sweden, add "US music weekly" before Billboard.

Shouldn't it be something like "music magazine"? I don't understand "US music weekly Billboard" :P Pancake (talk) 17:29, 24 April 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Yes, oops! I'm kinda sleepy, lol. Music magazine/journal it is :) Novice7 (talk) 17:32, 24 April 2011 (UTC)[reply]
lol:) the work is done. Pancake (talk) 17:33, 24 April 2011 (UTC)[reply]
  • sing vocals on a remix of his single "Sexual Eruption." – year after "Sexual Eruption" and the period should go outside the quote.

Composition

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  • Mention the name of the author before The Guardian's analysis.
  • Link synth
  • The first and only single, "Hang with Me", carries – remove the "first and only single" part. it is mentioned below (in Singles section).
  • "was described" repeats... (The fourth track, "Love Kills" was described as [...] "We Dance to the Beat" was described as..)
  • If possible, can you reduce the quoted material by converting them to reported speech?

Critical reception

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  • Indicate the Metacritic score summary (Generally favorable reviews)
  • Body Talk Pt. 2 is a perfectly solid-- and occasionally awesome-- – fix the "--" to "—"
  • Heather Phares of Allmusic wrote that Robyn proves with the album – Try Heather Phares of Allmusic wrote that through the album, Robyn proves that...

Commercial performance

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  • For the Billboard chart, can you provide the debut date/week?
  • Year after Robyn Is Here
  • I can see that there are few more charted regions. Maybe add them to this section?
I added "The album also reached the top fifty in Belgium (Flanders), Ireland, Finland, Germany and Austria". I don't think there's anything else to say :) Pancake (talk) 17:29, 24 April 2011 (UTC)[reply]
That's much better :) Novice7 (talk) 17:32, 24 April 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Singles

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  • I feel the thing about "Hang with Me" being recorded by Bruna and Robyn's comment on the song will fit better on "Background" section.

Charts

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  • Properly sourced and arranged. The only thing is that the Succession boxes should be moved and placed below the Metacritic external link (per WP:FOOTER)

References

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  • Refs 4,9,12,17,23,28,29,33,40,42,58 missing Publisher (I know, a big list :D)
  • Look out for overlinked references.

On hold for seven days. Novice7 (talk) 16:21, 24 April 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I think I've fixed everything now. let me know if i missed anything, or if there's something to improve further :) Pancake (talk) 17:05, 24 April 2011 (UTC)[reply]
I've underlined the remaining issues. Other are all done. Good job. Novice7 (talk) 17:23, 24 April 2011 (UTC)[reply]
I'm happy with the improvements. Passing :) Novice7 (talk) 17:37, 24 April 2011 (UTC)[reply]