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Talk:Battle of Fort Davidson/GA1

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GA Review

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Reviewer: Sturmvogel 66 (talk · contribs) 01:13, 19 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]


I'll get to this shortly.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 01:13, 19 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Sturmvogel - Expect some changes to the Fort Davidson description. I've been revising the version at Fort Davidson per the GA review, so once I get that version finalized, I'll copy it over or such (with attribution if needed, of course). Hog Farm Bacon 03:01, 19 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Would you like for me to hold off for a few days for you to take care of that? After diving so deep into the Rodney article, I have an itch to work on some short-lived British destroyers, so no rush on my end.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 03:46, 19 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]
No rush on mine, either. I'm taking finals this week, so I'd be a little slow on the response anyway. Hog Farm Bacon 03:52, 19 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Sturmvogel 66 - I've gotten the Fort Davidson stuff worked out, and the content here updated, so I'm ready for the review when you are. Hog Farm Bacon 23:58, 21 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]
OK.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 01:21, 22 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • No DABs
  • Images appropriately licensed
  • Link brigadier general and major on first use
    • Done, I think
      • Major in the lede.
        • Oh, I thought you were referring to Major General for some reason. Fixed
  • While intended to occur together, the attacks happened in a disjointed fashion, and were repulsed. Awkward
    • Done
      • Better, but if they occurred separately, wouldn't they necessarily be repulsed separately?
        • I've tried again
  • After the Fort Davidson repulses, the Confederate troops had low morale, Awkward, perhaps something like "Dispirited by the failed assaults on Fort Davidson, ..." or some such
    • Done
      • repulses reads very oddly here.
        • Makes sense to me, but probably to nobody else. I've reworded it.
  • Hyphen in large scale
    • Done
  • poorly armed or unarmed proximity alert for "armed", maybe "or lacking weapons"
    • Done
  • More later.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 11:44, 22 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • his and Colonel Thomas C. Fletcher's, commander of the 47th Missouri Infantry, political aspirations awkward
    • Done
  • Clarify that Fort Curtis was located further south near Arcadia
    • Clarified
  • fort's walls were 100 feet (30 m) needs an adjective here
    • Added
  • 10 feet (3.0 m) wide change this to {{convert|10|ft|m|adj=mid|-wide}} to format this properly
    • Done
      • doubled "wide"
        • Fixed.
  • the Confederate cannons fire on Fort Davidson fired?
    • Fixed
  • Clarify that the Confederates attacked from the south
    • The actually attacked from multiple different directions. Slayback from the north, and the ones coming down Pilot Knob attacked from the east, as well.
  • repulse them in piecemeal "one at a time" or "one by one"
    • Went with individually
  • in particular the 4th Missouri Cavalry Regiment and the 8th Missouri Cavalry Regiment trailing comma
    • Added
  • Alternate cannons with guns or artillery pieces, every so often
    • Rephrased two of the instances.
  • The repulses at For Davidson lowered the morale of the Confederate soldiers, and demonstrated that Price's army was of very low quality. awkward
    • Rephrased
      • Maybe it's just that I'm used to seeing "repulsed" and not "repulses", but that word still doesn't work for me here.
        • Is attempt #3 better?
  • Combine cites 45 and 46--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 18:27, 22 November 2020 (UTC)[reply]
    • Actually, one of the two was not the correct citation
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