Talk:Ancelma Perlacios/GA1

GA Review

Passed. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 09:12, 15 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: BennyOnTheLoose (talk · contribs) 14:20, 13 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)

It is reasonably well written.
a. (prose, spelling, and grammar):

b. (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a. (reference section):

b. (citations to reliable sources):

c. (OR):

d. (copyvio and plagiarism):
It is broad in its coverage.
a. (major aspects):

b. (focused):
It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias:
It is stable.
No edit wars, etc.:
It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
a. (images are tagged and non-free content have non-free use rationales):

b. (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall:
Pass/fail:

(Criteria marked are unassessed)

Happy to discuss, or be challenged on, any of my review comments. Regards, BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 14:20, 13 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Copyvio Check

I reviewed the three non-zero matches found using Earwig's Copyvio Detector. No concerns.
No issues about close paraphrasing detected; some machine translations had a bit of similarity to the article text but nothing I felt was unacceptable.

Image

Image is CC. Relevant, in infobox, with ALT text and a suitable caption; so all OK. Signature image is PD.

Early life and career

I'm not sure about the link from "common fact of life for many women". Maybe reword to use the term "Female education" and link that? (MOS:EASTEREGG)

Went ahead and just got rid of it. An article specific to Bolivia might merit inclusion, but alas none exists. Krisgabwoosh (talk) 22:14, 14 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Spot check on She completed portions of her primary schooling in her hometown up to the seventh grade but dropped out before advancing further - no issues
Spot check on Her situation reflected a common fact of life for many women in rural agrarian areas of the country, where high school attendance, much less graduation, was often infrequent, even into the second half of the twentieth century - no issues.
Her first functions were sounds slightly odd.

Changed to "roles." Krisgabwoosh (talk) 22:14, 14 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Spot check on rapid rise through the ranks of women's union leadership culminated in her 2008 election. I'm relying on machine translation, but I don't see this supported in the source.

Fifth line, states: "Ejecutiva de la Federación Regional Única de Mujeres Campesinas Irupana (FRUMCI) 2008-2010 y reelecta en la gestión 2010-2012." I took "reelected" here to indicate that her initial assumption of office was also subject to an election. Krisgabwoosh (talk) 22:14, 14 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

It was really the first part, "rapid rise through the ranks", that I was questioning. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 08:55, 15 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@BennyOnTheLoose: I see. Considering the time between her first local role in 2004 and her 2008 election is just four years, I'd say "rapid rise" is justified. If you really want, I could ditch the word "rapid" and leave it at just "rise". Krisgabwoosh (talk) 09:01, 15 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@Krisgabwoosh: I see your point, but I'd be happier if "rapid" was removed. Regards, BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 09:05, 15 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Krisgabwoosh (talk) 09:06, 15 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

secretary of defense of the coca leaf - this seems like a direct translation, is it a suitable way to phrase that? (I have no suggestion, I just don't know.)

No real other way to phrase it. On the surface, it seems just to be an advocacy position. The phrase "defense" likely stems from views towards US eradication policies. Krisgabwoosh (talk) 22:14, 14 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Chamber of Senators

Perlacios became the first-ever member of the Afro-Bolivian community to serve in the Senate and is the most recent individual to do so to date. - can't this be simplified to say that she is the only-ever "member of the Afro-Bolivian community to serve in the Senate"? Probably best to add an "As of.." and the year, to futureproof the statement.

That works. I can probably come back and change it back to "first-ever" should a second ever be elected. Krisgabwoosh (talk) 22:14, 14 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Spot check on one of the first two black women to have served in parliament - no issues.

Electoral history

Looks OK.

Infobox and Lead

"Preceded by Fidel Surco / Succeeded by Cecilia Requena" is not referenced.

I find that when it comes to predecessors or successors, there tends to be some leeway regarding citations, especially when redistricting and the like mean there's no real interaction between who came before and who came after. (See: John Olver, Richard Neal, Barney Frank, etc.). Krisgabwoosh (talk) 22:14, 14 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

As there isn't a conlcusion to an ongoing discussion about citations yet, happy to run with the precedents. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 08:55, 15 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

occupied a unique position in Bolivian parliamentary history is true, but reads a bit like MOS:PUFFERY to me.

Agreed. Shortened. Krisgabwoosh (talk) 22:14, 14 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

I think it would be worth adding some of the info from the tenure section into the lead, although of course the lead shouldn't be too long for a relatively short article.

Added. Krisgabwoosh (talk) 22:14, 14 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Sources

All look OK.
Optional: Cámara de Senadores (2016) - current citation is as a magazine, but there's no "magazine=" parameter. Would it be appropriate to use cite book instead?

Is Template:Cite magazine not valid? Perhaps I'm misunderstanding. Krisgabwoosh (talk) 22:14, 14 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Because of some script or othr I have installed, I see a message " Cite magazine requires magazine=" in the references, but I don't think there is any difference for most readers. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 08:50, 15 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for your work on the article. Krisgabwoosh. There are no major issues; I'll place it on hold. Regards, BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 15:01, 13 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

@Krisgabwoosh: I think it's just the point about "rapid rise" left to address. Regards, BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 08:57, 15 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

I'm satisfied that the article meets the GA criteria, so am passing it. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 09:09, 15 June 2023 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.