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Talk:Aleksandra Goryachkina/GA1

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GA Review

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Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Sanfranciscogiants17 (talk · contribs) 13:49, 10 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]


Early life and background

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2008–14: Two-time World Junior champion, second-youngest WGM

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2015–18: Teenage Grandmaster, two-time Russian champion

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2019–present: World Championship challenger

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  • in March highlighted by - sentence is turning into a bit of a run-on, how about in March. Her performance was highlighted by
    • Split in two: "Goryachkina gained back most of the rating points she lost in the preceding few months at the beginning of 2019. In particular, she scored 6½/11 at the 2019 European Individual Chess Championship in March, notably recording a win against Rauf Mamedov, who was rated 2701 at the time." Sportsfan77777 (talk) 15:47, 10 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • which was being revived in conjunction with the dissolution of the knockout format that had been used for the past two decades - not sure refs 55 and 56 cover this. If they don't, could you provide a citation for this?
  • by a wide margin of 1½ points - by 1½ points
I am not sure it is necessary to say this, anyway. I am accustomed to thinking of a margin of 1½ points as a wide margin, I don't need to be told. But if you really need to say that's a wide margin, then I recommend that instead of "by a wide margin of 1½ points", you say "by 1½ points, a wide margin".

I am not accustomed to seeing hyphens in "clear first", "joint first", "joint second", "career best", and so on. Is this some strange Wikipedia usage? Bruce leverett (talk) 16:49, 10 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

I'll fix that. Sportsfan77777 (talk) 18:08, 10 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Don't need "the" in "won on the tiebreak criteria." Bruce leverett (talk) 16:49, 10 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

"She resumed competition at the Russian World Championship Higher League ..." - Does the word "World" belong here? Bruce leverett (talk) 16:49, 10 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

And this. Sportsfan77777 (talk) 18:08, 10 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

International events

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  • at the 2013 European Team Chess Championship. She scored - at the 2013 European Team Chess Championship, scoring
  • Link Georgia
  • Since the previous paragraph starts with Goryachkina, start the second with In 2016, Goryachkina made her Chess Olympiad debut on the third board
  • She did not have a good performance, scoring 4.5/9 for a performance rating of 2328 as Russian finished one spot out of the medals - Undoubtedly true, but subjective. How about She finished 11th out of 20 on the board, scoring 4.5/9 for a performance rating of 2328 as Russian finished one spot out of the medals
  • Nonetheless, Goryachkina fared much better, winning the bronze medal on the second board and playing behind only Kosteniuk - Nonetheless, Goryachkina won a medal this time, earning the bronze on the second board and finishing behind only Kosteniuk
    • Changed to "Nonetheless, Goryachkina won a medal this time, winning the bronze on the second board while playing behind only Kosteniuk." (the last part is stating that Kosteniuk played on the top board) Sportsfan77777 (talk) 16:10, 10 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Nevertheless at their next event, Russia won their third consecutive European Team Championship. - I don't think nevertheless is a good transition, since China's not part of Europe. Also, what was Russia's next event?
  • Take out also in the last sentence.

National events

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  • Yamalo-Nenets Autonomous Okrug is referred to as YaNAO at first mention and Yamal in second. Use the same one so readers won't think you're talking about a different place the second time.

Personal life

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Are the bottom two links duplicates? If so, one should be removed; if not, they should be differentiated somehow. I know the spelling's different, but if it's additional records for the same person, there should be an explanatory note.

Great article! Most of my comments are just picky grammar suggestions. Once these changes are addressed, it should be a good article! Sanfranciscogiants17 (talk) 14:52, 10 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for the review, Sanfranciscogiants17!! I addressed everything above. Sportsfan77777 (talk) 16:44, 10 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Looks good, passing. Well done! Sanfranciscogiants17 (talk) 17:54, 10 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]