Talk:Alabama Pitts/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Hog Farm (talk · contribs) 17:58, 4 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]

"They divorced thereafter, and Pitts and his mother moved to Peoria, Illinois, where Erma became a telephone operator. Pitts attended Crossman School, a high school in New Orleans, Louisiana, for one year, and received a gold medal for high jump in 1924 at the age of 14" - It seems a little weird that at one mention, he's in Illinois, then he's in Louisiana all of a sudden. Anything in the sources that explains how he ended up in Louisiana?
"In 1929, Pitts robbed a New York City grocery store with a gun and stole $76.25 (presently, $1,135)" - It's generally best to avoid the use of presently, since the exact time frame referenced isn't obvious. Use the year the inflation values are for (I think there's a template somewhere that inserts the year, although it's only current to like 2018 or 2019) This also appears later.
- Y Modified. Eagles 24/7 (C) 20:15, 4 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Armed robberies isn't really the best title, given that most of the subject material isn't about the robberies. Incarceration, maybe?
The infobox says that the conviction occurred in 1930, but the exact year isn't mentioned anywhere, or cited anywhere. It's supported in the St. Petersburg Times reference cited for his death, although it gives a different theft total. Maybe indicate to that different sources differ on how much he stole.
There's some stuff in the early life section I'm not finding in that reference. The moving to Peoria and his mother's telephone operator job. His stepfather's first name. The mother and stepfather's divorce. The nickname Alabama. The fact that his father was in the cavalry.
- I've added page numbers for that information, it's mostly from the Outlaw Ballplayers book. Eagles 24/7 (C) 20:15, 4 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
The $76.25 total is in the SABR bio. You've cited it to the Birmingham News
"Pitts signed a one-year contract worth $500 per game (presently, $9,324 per game) on September 9, 1935" - Not seeing where the $500 per game is cited. Also, the article is dated September 9, 1935, and says the contract would be signed the next day, so I'm not sure that it is a great source for the date. SABR says "Either way, on September 9, 1935, he signed a generous contract for $1,500 to play for the Philadelphia Eagles in four exhibition games and four regular-season games", confirming the date, and the $1,500 divided by the three games he played does give $500 a game, but since it's not directly stated of $500 a game, that doesn't work, either.
Ref 8 claims to be " Philadelphia Eagles: The Complete Illustrated History", but the link takes me to the Outlaw Ballplayers book.
- Y Fixed. Eagles 24/7 (C) 20:15, 4 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
"due to flooding, where they became the Trenton Senators on July 2" - Source doesn't support the date.
"Eventually in 1936, he played football for the New Rochelle Bulldogs and Stapleton Buffaloes of the American Association" - Source cited doesn't directly confirm this happened in 1936.
"The Valdese Textiles of the Carolina League picked him up, and he had a batting average of .333 with the team" - Source says that he had a .333 batting average during his time in the Carolina League. Since Gastonia was also in the Carolina League, the source does not allow it to be determined that he hit .333 with Valdese.
In 1937, he scored 96 runs in only 321 at bats, according to the SABR bio. That's a very significant total, it should be mentioned. Yeah, it was a high-offense league, so that should be disclaimed, but in the current MLB, 96 runs is a very good total for over 500 at bats.
SABR mentions that he had a daughter. Worth mentioning in the article.
"Lawes sold Pitts' story to Warner Brothers in November 1935, and the film Over the Wall was released in April 1938 based on his life." - I find it concerning that the movie is said to have been released in 1938, but all three sources are from either 1935 or 1936, so they can't confirm the 1938 date.
The Berkshire Eagle reference citing the above sentence is from August 1935, and is too early to confirm either event. Since it doesn't support anything, it should be removed.
" A 24-year-old man was convicted of manslaughter in the death of Pitts, and sentenced to 10 to 15 years in prison on December 9, 1941 - Not seeing where the exact December 9 date is in the source. The paper's from December 11, and doesn't give an exact date.
I'm not convinced by the Charlotte Observer citation that the killer was released on that exact date. Yeah, it's a guy in prison for killing someone with an uncommon name, but since the source doesn't directly connect him to Pitts, it's a bit of a stretch to assume that was the same person. FWIW, SABR says Lafevers was released with time served later, and that Pitts was also acting aggressively. It might also be worth noting in the article that eyewitnesses said that Pitts was drunk and aggressive.
Consider removing the NFL.com stats link in the infobox, as it doesn't take the reader to anything really useful.
You need a citation for the career statistics in the infobox
Remove the (through 1940) disclaimer, as its obvious the stats are his complete career stats.
Do you have a copy of the Philadelphia Eagles book to check the publisher and location? Worldcat gives MVP Publishing out of Minneapolis, although if the book says something different, go with what the print copy says. Check edition, maybe?
Date of birth is never cited anywhere. Also, SABR gives a different date of birth than the one you have in the article, which is cited to an article that it doesn't appear in.
The image is listed as PD no copyright notice, but doesn't the newspaper generally have copyright over what's published in it? I honestly don't know with this.
- I looked through the entire newspaper the image was printed in from The Birmingham News and saw no disclaimers or copyrights anywhere. I could be mistaken, but I believe there needs to be some statement somewhere that it's copyrighted. I used the Hirtle chart as well. Eagles 24/7 (C) 20:15, 4 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Height and weight aren't cited anywhere. It's also unclear at what age these were measured.

Whew, quite a bit on this one. I'll give it another run-through once these comments get addressed. Since the source checks didn't go well this time around, I'm going to give that especial attention. Hog Farm _Bacon 19:20, 4 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]

@Hog Farm: Thank you for the review! I've begun to address some of your comments and responded to others above. Eagles 24/7 (C) 20:15, 4 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]

@Eagles247: - Any update on this? Hog Farm _Bacon 20:49, 22 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]

@Hog Farm: I will need to withdraw the nomination at this time. Thank you for the initial review, when I find more time I will address your concerns and re-nominate. Eagles 24/7 (C) 01:36, 23 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]

@Eagles247:- That's too bad. If you have any questions, ping me and I can try to take a look at some point. Hog Farm _Bacon —Preceding undated comment added 01:37, 23 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]