Talk:Air Battle Manager
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Untitled
[edit]This article needs references. Could the original author please go back through and cite his sources, or if it is from personal knowledge, at least acknowledge it?
Spaceman3750 (talk) 06:14, 25 March 2008 (UTC)
- @Spaceman3750: I have added citations and updated the page significantly. Balon Greyjoy (talk) 04:51, 10 December 2017 (UTC)
Jargon
[edit]This article makes extensive use of "insider" terminology and concepts, so that much of it is difficult for a non-expert to follow. It is also written with a very strong US orientation; a more international perspective would be more fitting. Davidhof (talk) 18:48, 5 September 2015 (UTC)
- @Davidhof: I have reduced much of the content of this page to less detailed descriptions that should be easier to read. However, as an Air Battle Manager, I may be biased as to what is too technical. Balon Greyjoy (talk) 04:52, 10 December 2017 (UTC)
- @Balon Greyjoy: It is much more readable now, and has good references, so I removed the templates. There is still room for improvement. Suppose that your intelligent and capable 13-year-old niece or nephew, who knows nothing about military matters, said to you, “Uncle Balon, I think I might want to be an Air Battle Manager when I grow up. It sounds cool. But even after reading the article about them in Wikipedia, I’m still not 100% clear on how you become one, and what sorts of things you actually do on a typical day once you are one.” What additional information would you try to provide in your answer? Then, how could that information be added to the article, while maintaining a nontechnical encyclopedic style? If you can think of good answers, the article could be made better still by incorporating the result. Davidhof (talk) 20:06, 2 January 2018 (UTC)
- @Davidhof: I'll get to work on improving the article. The only issue I see is that most of my knowledge would be counted as original research, and there isn't much published material to cite. Balon Greyjoy (talk) 01:45, 6 January 2018 (UTC)
- @Balon Greyjoy: It is much more readable now, and has good references, so I removed the templates. There is still room for improvement. Suppose that your intelligent and capable 13-year-old niece or nephew, who knows nothing about military matters, said to you, “Uncle Balon, I think I might want to be an Air Battle Manager when I grow up. It sounds cool. But even after reading the article about them in Wikipedia, I’m still not 100% clear on how you become one, and what sorts of things you actually do on a typical day once you are one.” What additional information would you try to provide in your answer? Then, how could that information be added to the article, while maintaining a nontechnical encyclopedic style? If you can think of good answers, the article could be made better still by incorporating the result. Davidhof (talk) 20:06, 2 January 2018 (UTC)
Removal of jargon and citations banner
[edit]As the body of the article has been drastically reduced, and numerous citations were added, I propose removing their banners. Balon Greyjoy (talk) 06:17, 10 December 2017 (UTC)
- Concur. I took them out. Davidhof (talk) 20:08, 2 January 2018 (UTC)
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