Talk:26 Broadway/GA1
The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Reviewer: Vami IV (talk · contribs) 09:37, 5 April 2020 (UTC)
Opening statement
[edit]In reviews I conduct, I may make small copyedits. These will only be limited to spelling and punctuation (removal of double spaces and such). I will only make substantive edits that change the flow and structure of the prose if I previously suggested and it is necessary. For replying to Reviewer comment, please use Done, Fixed, Added, Not done, Doing..., or Removed, followed by any comment you'd like to make. I will be crossing out my comments as they are redressed, and only mine. A detailed, section-by-section review will follow. —♠Vami_IV†♠ 09:37, 5 April 2020 (UTC)
- @Vami IV: Thanks for the review. I have addressed all your comments above. epicgenius (talk) 15:20, 5 April 2020 (UTC)
Prose
[edit]that is inspired
was inspired.- Done
as well as above the 18th and 22nd
Shorten "as well as" to "and".- Done
it consists of a recessed double-height arch, with elaborately carved spandrels at the top of the arch.
Consider "at its top".- Done
these doorways are located within doorways topped by pediments and clocks.
Replace the first "doorways" with something else.- Done That was an error. epicgenius (talk) 15:20, 5 April 2020 (UTC)
"Features": Atlas Obscura, which uses user-generated material, is not a reliable source.- I thought so. This is a direct quote, but Removed anyway. epicgenius (talk) 15:20, 5 April 2020 (UTC)
Move the image in "Initial structure" to the right.- Done
"Twenty-six Broadway was once to oil what 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue [the White House] is to politics."
Just use the White Houses's address to link the White House here.- Done
every cent any of [Standard Oil's subsidiaries] made found its way to 26 Broadway"
reads weird- Fixed myself after finishing the review, after after I had a staircase wit moment and remembered this, by removing "any" –♠Vami_IV†♠ 11:31, 6 April 2020 (UTC)
After World War I, Walter C. Teagle
Who?- Done
(died 1928)
Delete.- Done I thought it was relevant to the narrative, but apparently not. epicgenius (talk)
- Would be if his death effected the lease. –♠Vami_IV†♠ 16:07, 5 April 2020 (UTC)
- Vami IV, it did not. epicgenius (talk) 16:41, 5 April 2020 (UTC)
- Would be if his death effected the lease. –♠Vami_IV†♠ 16:07, 5 April 2020 (UTC)
- Done I thought it was relevant to the narrative, but apparently not. epicgenius (talk)
The content of "Tenats#Former" should be carefully inserted into "History".- Done
A third, the Urban Assembly School of Business for Young Women, is a high school serving grades 9-12.
When did this open?- Done 2005.
Starting in 2008, the PS 234 elementary school was supposed to have used [...] subsequently deemed "not appropriate for kindergartners"
This would make this school not a current tenant. Shorten and send this sentence and its citation into "History"- Done
[67]:540
This is the only instance of this form of citation in the article. The [67] part also already has the page number(s).
GA progress
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