Talk:2016 Paris ePrix/GA1
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Reviewer: Kpgjhpjm (talk · contribs) 16:23, 4 August 2018 (UTC)
Let us start this GA review . Kpgjhpjm 16:23, 4 August 2018 (UTC)
Lead
[edit]- Please change in the Les Invalides building complex before a crowd of 20,000 . to in the Les Invalides building complex . A total of 20,000 people attended the race . Kpgjhpjm 16:31, 4 August 2018 (UTC)
- Please change but lost his advantage to DiGrassi on the run to the first corner . to but was passed by DiGrassi on the run to the first corner. Kpgjhpjm 16:36, 4 August 2018 (UTC)
- Please change but retained his hold on third position . to but managed to retain the third position in the Championship . Kpgjhpjm 16:46, 4 August 2018 (UTC)
- @MWright96: It's late night in my time zone , I will review the rest of the article tomorrow . Kpgjhpjm 17:09, 4 August 2018 (UTC)
Background and preparation
[edit]1st paragraph
[edit]- Please change Coming into the race from Long Beach 3 weeks earlier. to After winning the previous round at Long Beach 3 weeks earlier , Kpgjhpjm 03:07, 5 August 2018 (UTC)
- Please change and Jerome D Ambrosio for Dragon had seven points less in the battle for the position. to , seven ahead of Jerome D Ambrosio of Dragon in the battle for third position . Kpgjhpjm 05:35, 5 August 2018 (UTC)
Second Paragraph
[edit]- No issues
Third Paragraph
[edit]- No issues
Fourth Paragraph
[edit]- No real issues , but I will be making a few tweaks .
Practice and Qualifying
[edit]First Paragraph
[edit]- In the first sentence remove the second occurrence of the word Sunday .
- The team names in the parenthesis is not needed . Kpgjhpjm 15:40, 5 August 2018 (UTC)
Second Paragraph
[edit]- No issues
Third Paragraph
[edit]- No issues
Fourth Paragraph
[edit]- Mostry OK , I have made a tweak though . Kpgjhpjm 15:40, 5 August 2018 (UTC)
Fifth Paragraph
[edit]- @MWright96: : Can you say what is meant by lost time in the first second . I think it might be lost time in the first sector. Kpgjhpjm 15:48, 5 August 2018 (UTC)
Race
[edit]This is the section with problems in many Motorsports articles .
First Paragraph
[edit]- When the race started . Remove the word when and capitalise T in the .
Second Paragraph
[edit]- Remove the word Nevertheless
- A tweaks will be made by me here .
Third Paragraph
[edit]- In the previous paragraph , it is stated that Buemi and Turvey were battling for fifth place , so when Buemi passed Turvey, he moved into fifth . So when he passed Sarrazin , that move should be for fourth .
- Please fix this - if di Grassi was leading , Vergne second , Bird third , and as per above sentence Buemi fourth , then where did Prost come from .
Fourth Paragraph
[edit]- Change due to the tight track to due to the tightness of the track .
- Change used FanBoost to used his FanBoost - he can' use the FanBoost of others .
Fifth Paragraph
[edit]- No issues
Post-Race
[edit]- No issues
Classification
[edit]- Question : Why are names of some drivers in bold ?
Comments
[edit]- On-hold for now , @MWright96: On these issues are fixed , I will take a final look and then promote the article. The issues in the Race section's third paragraph are very important ,So please take some time to fix them . When you are done , please ping me . Kpgjhpjm 12:54, 6 August 2018 (UTC)
- @MWright96: Looks like all issues are fixed . Taking a final look . Kpgjhpjm 13:34, 6 August 2018 (UTC)
- @MWright96: It's see no more issues , passing . Kpgjhpjm 13:42, 6 August 2018 (UTC)
- @MWright96: Looks like all issues are fixed . Taking a final look . Kpgjhpjm 13:34, 6 August 2018 (UTC)