Talk:2010 Summer Youth Olympics torch relay/GA1
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Reviewer: ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 02:11, 9 January 2011 (UTC)
- "A number of famous athletes" - that's pretty vague (in the lede).
- "Notably, a schoolboy, Low Wei Jie, was given the opportunity to bear the torch following local newspaper reports of him having chased after the torch throughout the day earlier." - is that really notable or unusual? I find it odd to single out one person.
Done Notability added.
- "the link that connects (sic) the youth of the world to the Olympic movement" - why the sic? It works fine grammatically.
Done Removed.
- "While there was active community participation in the torch relay, some were reserved about the event and the games itself." - that feels like it could use more explanation, however brief.
- "Although the International Olympic Committee decided that all Olympic torch relays beyond the 2008 Summer Olympics in Beijing would be held within the host city, an exception was made for Singapore" - maybe I'm confused, but the 2010 one was held all across Canada. Should that be "held within the host country"?
Done Removed after verification it is 2014 onwards.
- "Minister Mentor Lee Kuan Yew" - should probably get a wikilink. Otherwise I don't think he's important
Done
- "However, the Youth Olympic flame was to last till the closing ceremony of the games." - I don't get that. Does it usually not do that? I'm stuck up on the "however"
- The second paragraph of "Concept" needs a ref
- Be sure every unit in the article has an imperial conversion
- The second paragraph of "Torch" is unsourced, as is the aircraft section
- Can some of the sections in "relay elements" be combined, so the ToC is shorter?
Done merge a section in.
- The end of "Flame lighting ceremony in Greece" is unsourced
- The second paragraph of "Dakar, Senegal" is unsourced
Done Sourced.
- "time had been lost as the flame crossed the International Dateline" - is that important? If so, it needs context
- The 2nd paragraph of "Day 2, 8 August 2010" is unsourced
- Do you really need to say 2010 so often?
DoneRemoved 2010 from sub sections header.
- I notice there are two "Disambiguation tags". Not that it's a huge issue, but there shouldn't be tags in a GA
- In the table for "Domestic torch relay route", why are South East and North West unlinked?
Done
- The first time you use YOG, I was confused, since you never have that next to its fully explained acronym. Be sure to fix that.
Done
- How many torchbearers were youths? Is there anything more specific than "a large number"?
- Why were those five cities chosen for the torch route? I understand they represented the five continents (and you should clarify that the committee did indeed consider North and South America as one), but I can help wondering why Berlin, why Mexico City, etc.
- Was there any more reaction to the torch relay? Any reaction to it being global again after China? How long had the route been planned?
It's not that it's a bad article, but I see too many issues. I realize it's been on GAN since October, but I see too many problems to put it on hold. When you feel you've addressed these points, feel free to contact me, and I'll do another GA review, so you don't have to wait another 10 weeks! --♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 02:11, 9 January 2011 (UTC)