Grasmere (village): Difference between revisions
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==The Local Village Store== |
==The Local Village Store== |
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If you do happen to stumble across Grasmere (maybe by accident or by no fault of your own), a trip to the local co-op '''would not be''' recommended. The immigrants have taken it over, and have dragged the standards down. All I wanted was a Kit-Kat but they took 5 minutes to put someone on the till, then an extra 5 minutes to work out the right change! |
If you do happen to stumble across Grasmere (maybe by accident or by no fault of your own), a trip to the local co-op '''would not be''' recommended. The immigrants have taken it over, and have dragged the standards down. All I wanted was a Kit-Kat but they took 5 minutes to put someone on the till, then an extra 5 minutes to work out the right change! [[Image:Crap-op.jpg|center|thumb|The so called 'Crap-Op']] |
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==Geography== |
==Geography== |
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Revision as of 12:28, 29 January 2008
| Grasmere | |
|---|---|
| Location | Lake District, Cumbria |
| Coordinates | 54°27′N 3°01′W / 54.450°N 3.017°W |
| Basin countries | United Kingdom |
| Max. depth | 23 metres (75 ft) |
Grasmere (also known as 'Gras-vegas') is a charming village in central Cumbria in the north west of England. Full of gang warfare and drug abuse, it clings of to its 'tourist hot-spot' status mainly due to the dead poet Wordsworth. Flocks of Japanese folk come here to view his grave, whilst successfully blocking up the pavements and generally get in the way. [citation needed]
The Local Village Store
If you do happen to stumble across Grasmere (maybe by accident or by no fault of your own), a trip to the local co-op would not be recommended. The immigrants have taken it over, and have dragged the standards down. All I wanted was a Kit-Kat but they took 5 minutes to put someone on the till, then an extra 5 minutes to work out the right change!
Geography
The village is overlooked by the small rocky hill of Helm Crag, popularly known as the Lion and the Lamb; due to the shape of rock formations on its summit.
The A591 connects Grasmere northwards over Dunmail Raise to the Vale of Keswick and southwards to Ambleside. This 2.5 mile stretch of road is perfectly suited for the fortnightly street race scene, where competitors drive their motors along the strip.
Red Light District
Gras-vegas (like most places these days) has its very own red light district. From the drug usage, crack houses have developed, these then expanded into private brothels offering nothing to the community.
Government
As of 29/01/2008 the new governor of 'Gras-vegas' is Betty Swallocks.
Famous inhabitants
- William Wordsworth lived in Dove Cottage, in the hamlet of Townend, on the outskirts of Grasmere, from 1799 to 1808. He is buried in the graveyard of St. Oswald's Church, Grasmere, alongside his wife, Mary and their family. His sister, Dorothy Wordsworth, is buried alongside him too.
- Samuel Taylor Coleridge also spent time in Dove Cottage, as did Thomas de Quincey.
- Sarah Nelson was the original owner and maker of the famous Grasmere Gingerbread, which is a secret recipe. The shop is near the village centre in a tiny house next to the church.
BUT THEIR ALL DEAD NOW SO THEY DON'T COUNT!
BUT STING OWNS A HOUSE HERE!
External links
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