Jump to content

Wikipedia:Principle of Some Astonishment: Difference between revisions

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Content deleted Content added
Line 121: Line 121:
::{{tq|The '''Irish Boundary Commission''' <del>was a commission which</del> met in 1924–25 to decide on the precise delineation of the border between the Irish Free State and Northern Ireland.}}
::{{tq|The '''Irish Boundary Commission''' <del>was a commission which</del> met in 1924–25 to decide on the precise delineation of the border between the Irish Free State and Northern Ireland.}}
:Comment: So... the commission was a commission?
:Comment: So... the commission was a commission?


;{{anchor|commission}}In the article ''[https://wiki.riteme.site/?diff=844521515 Society for the History of Alchemy and Chemistry]:''

::{{tq|The '''Society for the History of Alchemy and Chemistry''' <s>is a society devoted to the history of alchemy and chemistry. The Society</s> was founded as the ''Society for the Study of Alchemy and Early Chemistry'' in 1935.}}
:Comment: Surprise!





Revision as of 13:45, 5 June 2018

Principle of Some Astonishment

In anything at all, perfection is finally attained not when there is no longer anything to add, but when there is no longer anything to take away.

Saint-Exupéry, Wind, Sand and Stars (tr. Lewis Galantière)

Can we get you on Mastermind, Sybil? "Next contestant, Sybil Fawlty from Torquay; specialist subject, the bleedin' obvious! "

Sometimes editors clutter their prose with pedestrian details that the reader likely already knows or would naturally assume. Rather than informing readers, this wastes their time and brainpower. These are examples of articles belaboring the routine and obvious, at times painfully:


You mean the game pieces can be stored for later use? I'm astonished!
In the article Pick-up sticks:
At the end of play, points are tallied up and the pieces can be thrown again or stored in a container for another use.
Comment: Of course the points are tallied up at the end of the game. Of course players can either play again or put the game away "in a container". (If the rules said to ignore the score sheet at the end, then called for players to burn the game pieces or use them to commit ritual suicide, THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.)


In the lead of Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum theft:
Once inside, the pair revealed their true intentions, tied up the guards, and spent over an hour stealing art from the museum's collection, which they loaded into their vehicle.
Comment: The guards probably sensed their visitors' "true intentions" around the time they got tied up, and our readers will make the same inference vicariously. Furthermore, in this modern age most readers will envision art thieves as having a vehicle at the ready. (Had they absconded via public transport, or summoned an Uber, THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.)


In the article US Airways Flight 1549:
The weather recorded at 2:51 p.m. was 10 miles visibility with broken clouds at 3,700 feet, wind 8 knots from 290°, temperature -6° C.
Comment: Of course it was recorded, otherwise how would we know it?
Sullenberger asked if they could attempt an emergency landing in New Jersey, mentioning Teterboro Airport ... air traffic controllers quickly contacted Teterboro and gained permission for a landing on Runway 1
Comment: The word quickly is superfluous, because our readers' innate cunning will inform them that controllers generally act with dispatch in such situations. (Had they instead been lackadaisical, THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.)
However, Sullenberger told controllers that "We can't do it," and "We're gonna be in the Hudson," signaling his intention to bring the plane down on the Hudson River because he was too low to glide to any airport.
Comment: The part from "signalling his intention ..." on is probably unnecessary, because our readers aren't mentally defective. They will conclude without being told that when Sullenberger said "We can't do it ... We're gonna be in the Hudson", he's hinting that (a) he's going to land on the Hudson and (b) he's taking this unconventional step because more orthodox landing sites are out of reach. (Had he instead done it because he wanted a bath, THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.)
Immediately after the A320 had been ditched, Sullenberger opened the cockpit door and gave the "evacuate" order.
Comment: The immediately bit seems unnecessary. (Had the captain made a cup of tea before ordering "Evacuate!", THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.)
The first fire chief on scene transmitted a "10-60" to confirm a major emergency.
Comment: If the fire chief, seeing people crowded onto the wings of a sinking airliner, had radioed, "False alarm – no big deal", THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.


In the article University of Texas Tower Shooting:
He then drove to a hardware store, where he purchased a Universal M1 carbine, two additional ammunition magazines and eight boxes of ammunition, telling the cashier he planned to hunt wild hogs. At a gun shop he purchased four further carbine magazines, six additional boxes of ammunition, and a can of gun cleaning solvent. He then drove to Sears, where he purchased a Sears Model 60 12 gauge semi-automatic shotgun before returning home with his purchases.
Comment: If he'd bought all that stuff and then left it at the store, THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.


In the article Charles Whitman:
Whitman was reportedly the youngest person in the world ever to become an Eagle Scout at that time.
Comment: Are people becoming Eagle Scouts elsewhere than "in the world"? Perhaps on Mars?


In the article Club of Rome:
The Club of Rome raised considerable public attention with its report Limits to Growth, which has sold 30 million copies in more than 30 translations, making it the best-selling environmental book in world history.
Comment: I think you see where I'm going with this.


In the article Saving Private Ryan:
In Washington, D.C, General George Marshall is informed that three of the four Ryan brothers have been killed within the last week, and that their mother is about to be notified of their deaths.
Comment: Well, they weren't notifying her that she'd won the Pillsbury Bake-Off.
Caution: May contain oranges.
Caution: May contain babies.


In the article Citrus juice:
The most commonly consumed type of citrus juice is orange juice, which as the name implies, is extracted from oranges.
Comment: But then, baby oil isn't extracted from babies, is it?


In the article Stone's representation theorem for Boolean algebras:
The theorem was first proved by Marshall H. Stone (1936), and thus named in his honor.
Comment: And here I thought it was proved by Marshall H. Stone but named for some other Stone.


In the article Rodney Alcala
Her murder would remain unsolved until it was connected to Alcala in 2011.
Comment: Murders usually remain unsolved until they're solved.


In the article Ted Bundy:
He broke through the ceiling into the apartment of the chief jailer—who was out for the evening with his wife—changed into street clothes from the jailer's closet, and walked out the front door to freedom.
Comment: While it's nice to know a busy chief jailer still has time for his spouse, absent mention of a confrontation the reader's common sense will tell him that Mr. and Mrs. Turnkey weren't home. (Had they helped Bundy pick out a tie to go with his new civvies, or had Bundy walked out the door then gone around the corner to turn himself in, THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.)


In the article Seth Black (serial killer):
At the request of Scottish detectives, the Metropolitan Police conducted a search of searched Black's Stamford Hill lodgings to determine whether any incriminating evidence existed at Black's address.
Comment: Yes, well, that's usually what they're trying to determine. (And click the link for a surprise.)


In the article Murder of Jo Cox:
He witnessed the assailant stab Cox, who fell to the ground, before shooting her and stabbing her again shoot her, then stab her again. The attacker left the scene, but was pursued by an eyewitness who followed him and telephoned police to describe his location identified him to police. Armed police officers attended the incident, and arrested a suspect.
Comment: There's a lot to say about this one.
  • who fell to the ground: Persons stabbed and shot, then stabbed again, usually go down. (Extra points for the ambiguous suggestion that the witness shot and stabbed the victim.)
  • left the scene: If the shooter/stabber had stuck around, THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.
  • was pursued by an eyewitness who followed him: That's what pursuers do.
  • telephoned police to describe his location: Usually people calling for help give the location.
  • Armed police officers attended the incident: Even in law-abiding, Queensberry-Rules, you-got-me-copper-fair-and-square England, readers will imagine that amongst officers dispatched to the shooting/stabbing of a Member of Parliament, at least some will be armed with more than their charming accents and unfailing courtesy.
  • and arrested a suspect: That's what happens when an eyewitness points out the gunman. Had police let him off with just a stern talking-to, THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.


In the article Death of Elisa Lam:
On the morning of February 19, an employee went to the roof, where four 1,000-gallon water tanks provided water pumped from the city's supply, to the guest rooms, a kitchen, and a coffee shop downstairs. In one of them, he found Lam's body, floating face up a foot below the water surface. Police responded.
Comment: [Left as an exercise for the reader]


In the article Eric Muenter:
Morgan lunged at his attacker and tackled Muenter to the ground as he fired two rounds into Morgan's groin and thigh. Morgan's butler finished subduing Muenter, beating him senseless with a lump of coal. Morgan quickly summoned a doctor and recovered, returning to work on August 14.
Comment: If financier J.P. Morgan got shot in the groin and didn't summon a doctor, or summoned him other than "quickly", THAT would be worth mentioning in the article. (Kudos to the butler for his skill in wielding the coal.)


In the article Irish Boundary Commission:
The Irish Boundary Commission was a commission which met in 1924–25 to decide on the precise delineation of the border between the Irish Free State and Northern Ireland.
Comment: So... the commission was a commission?


In the article Society for the History of Alchemy and Chemistry:
The Society for the History of Alchemy and Chemistry is a society devoted to the history of alchemy and chemistry. The Society was founded as the Society for the Study of Alchemy and Early Chemistry in 1935.
Comment: Surprise!


In the article Hardcore Henry:
After she replaces a missing arm and leg with hi-tech cybernetic prostheses, mercenaries led by the psychokinetic Akan raid the ship.
Comment: What, pray tell, would a lo-tech cybernetic prosthesis look like?


In the article Chloe:
Chloe (also Chloë, Chloé) is a feminine name for girls.
Comment: It might have been more interesting if it were a feminine name for boys or a masculine name for girls.


In the article Henry Riggs Rathbone:
Rathbone successfully graduated from Phillips Academy in 1888, from Yale University in 1892, and from the Law Department at the University of Wisconsin in 1894.
Comment: Graduations are usually successful (except of course a graduation from Yale, which by definition is the first in a lifelong string of degradations).


In the article :
From left to right: assassin John Wilkes Booth, Abraham Lincoln, Mary Todd Lincoln, Clara Harris, and Henry Rathbone



Comment: It's a common misconception that the man with the gun is Mrs. Lincoln.


In the article The Wizard of Oz (1939 film):
Bert Lahr, in costume as The Cowardly Lion



Comment: Not a bad case of hirsutism?


In the article Donald Trump:
A view of the Turnberry Hotel, in Ayrshire, Scotland



Comment: The reader will know without being told that this is a "view". (While Wee Eck would feel insulted that the reader didn't know where Ayrshire was, it's possible that the reader comes from some obscure place such as North Dakota where they might think it was just outside London.)

View of the crowd attending a Trump rally in the U.S. Bank Arena, Cincinnati, Ohio on October 13, 2016



Comment: We're safe in assuming that the reader will intuit that this "view" shows a "crowd".

In the article Phase precession:
Example of an EEG theta wave



Comment: Could have been worse – it could have said Example of a graph of an EEG theta wave.


In the article Harry Elkins Widener:
Harry Elkins Widener
Harry Elkins Widener
Born(1885-01-03)January 3, 1885
DiedApril 15, 1912(1912-04-15) (aged 27)
Known forNamesake of Harry Elkins Widener Memorial Library
Signature
Comment: Did I mention that it's Harry Elkins Widener?


In the article CNN International:
CNN International
CountryUnited States
Ownership
OwnerTurner Broadcasting System
Comment: No shit, Sherlock. (Turns out this is the logo for all CNN brands, not just CNN International – an example of the impulse to add the obvious leading to the addition, instead, of the inaccurate.)


In the article James Agee:
James Agee Park in the Fort Sanders neighborhood of Knoxville, Tennessee is named after the author.



Comment: Who would have guessed?


The lead (and only) image in the article Twist tie:
Twist ties of different colors.



Comment: Great example of an image that doesn't need a caption.


The lead image in the article Icebox:
File:Icebox 1.jpg
Labeled black-and-white image of an icebox



Comment: We can see it's labeled, we can see it's black-and-white, we can see it's an image, and the discerning reader will realize, given that this is the article Icebox, that it's an icebox.


In the article Boston Consolidated TRACON:
The Boston Consolidated TRACON from the outside



Comment: And here I thought they had a giant indoor lawn, miniature building-within-a-building, and artificial sky.


In the article Senghenydd colliery disaster:
The funeral of one of the dead miners,miner E Gilbert, a colour sergeant in The Salvation Army
Crowds wait for news at the Universal Colliery after the disaster



Comment: Funerals are for dead people.

Comment: Yes, since they're not clairvoyant.


In the article Elizabeth II:
The Queen with Edward Heath (left) and First Lady Pat Nixon, 1970



Comment: Yes, because we weren't sure which of the three is Edward Heath. (Apparently you're on your own for Pat Nixon vs. the Queen.)

Special section on modes of exit and ancillary details of death

In the article Grace Kelly:
Rainier, who did not remarry, was buried alongside her following his death in 2005.
Comment: Had Prince Ranier of Monaco been buried alive, THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.


In the article Simon Meyer Kuper:
On the evening of 8 March 1963, Kuper, who was at home with his wife and daughter, was shot through a window by an unknown assailant. He died of his injuries twelve days later.
Comment: If he was shot by an unknown assailant but died twelve days later on being surprised by a train, THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.


In the article Karen Carpenter:
Paramedics found her heart beating once every 10 seconds. She was taken to nearby Downey Community Hospital for treatment.
Comment: Thanks for clarifying.


In the article Gary M. Heidnik:
Heidnik was executed by lethal injection on July 6, 1999, at State Correctional Institution – Rockview in Centre County, Pennsylvania. His body was later cremated.
Comment: Not before, thankfully.


In the article Roy L. Dennis:
His body was donated to UCLA Medical Center after he died.
Comment: Let us hope so.

Principle of Complete Puzzlement

The opposite of the Principle of Some Astonishment is the Principle of Complete Puzzlement: some details don't belong because, though neither obvious nor even predictable, they're completely irrelevant and will puzzle the reader as to the reason for their inclusion.


In the article Chuck Schumer:
In March 2009, Schumer announced his support for same-sex marriage, noting that it "was time". Schumer previously supported civil unions. At a private risotto dinner with gay leaders ...
Comment: What does risotto have to do with anything? Would we see Schumer in a different light if instead paella or pilaf or pancakes had been served? What about the kind of wine they drank?


In the article 2015 Thalys train attack:
The remaining passengers were taken to a gym in Arras, where they were searched and identified before being allowed to proceed to Paris.
Comment: Good to know they could get in some cardio while waiting.


In the article on courageous flight attendant Barbara Jane Harrison:
On the day of the accident, as was often her practice when on duty, Harrison was wearing a black wig.
Comment: Even in death a girl should always look her best, I guess.


Michael Kinsley's "Department of Amplification: William Shawn and the temple of facts" (The New Republic, 1984) is a pitch-perfect sendup of The New Yorker as "a weekly monument to the proposition that journalism consists of the endless accretion of tiny details":

The June 18 New Yorker has an article about corn. It's the first in what appears to be a series, no less, discussing the major grains. What about corn? Who knows? Only The New Yorker would have the lofty disdain for its readers to expect them to plow through 22,000 words about corn (warning: only an estimate; the TNR fact checkers are still counting) without giving them the slightest hint why. Here is how it starts (after a short introductory poem):

When the New England farmer and botanist Edward Sturtevant retired, in 1887, as head of the New York Agricultural Experiment Station, in Geneva, he left behind a bulky manuscript that was published in 1919, twenty-one years after his death, as "Sturtevant's Notes on Edible Plants." Dr. Sturtevant, who was also a graduate of the Harvard Medical School, but never practiced medicine, had scoured the world’s botanical literature for mentions of all the plants that human beings were known to have eaten (he did not count tree bark, which in times of famine was often one of them), and had come up with among more than three hundred thousand known plant species, two thousand eight hundred and ninety-seven edibles. (Latter-day scientists believe he may have missed as many more.) But, of all these, only a hundred and fifty or so have ever been widely enough consumed to figure in commerce, and of those a mere handful have been of any real consequence.

Now, there are some facts for you. No doubt every single one of them has been checked. You stand in awe as they tumble toward you, magnificently irrelevant, surrounded by mighty commas, mere numbers swollen into giant phrases ("two thousand eight hundred and ninety-seven"), all finally crashing over you with the bravura announcement that nothing you have just read is "of any real consequence." How true this is! From the end of the paragraph, you gaze back on the receding vistas of inconsequence, as far as the eye can see. Even supposing we would like a bit more information about corn, and even supposing we might be relieved to know how many other plants, edible and otherwise, are not going to be discussed in this article, why are we being told about a man whose count apparently was off by half? Even supposing we need to know about Dr. Sturtevant’s book, when it was published, and when the good doctor died, why do we need to know when he retired? Even—stretching it—supposing that we need to know that this gentleman "was also a graduate of the Harvard Medical School," why, oh why, do we have to learn that he "never practiced medicine"? As for the business about tree bark, that has just got to be conscious self-parody.

Remind you of any Wikipedia articles?

Puckish citations
  1. ^ "Fawlty Towers: 20 of Basil's best rants". The Daily Telegraph. November 27, 2015. Retrieved September 12, 2017.