Wikipedia:Principle of Some Astonishment: Difference between revisions
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Revision as of 05:16, 3 February 2018
![]() | This is an essay on concise, uncluttered writing. It contains the advice or opinions of one or more Wikipedia contributors. This page is not an encyclopedia article, nor is it one of Wikipedia's policies or guidelines, as it has not been thoroughly vetted by the community. Some essays represent widespread norms; others only represent minority viewpoints. |
![]() | This page in a nutshell: The Principle of least astonishment notwithstanding, strive to omit obvious details from articles. |
Principle of Some Astonishment
In anything at all, perfection is finally attained not when there is no longer anything to add, but when there is no longer anything to take away.
Saint-Exupéry, Wind, Sand and Stars (tr. Lewis Galantière)
Can we get you on Mastermind, Sybil? "Next contestant, Sybil Fawlty from Torquay; specialist subject, the bleedin' obvious! "
Sometimes editors clutter their prose with pedestrian details that the reader likely knows already or would naturally assume. Far from making the page more informative, this wastes the reader's time and brainpower. These are examples of articles belaboring the routine and obvious, at times painfully:
![](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/50/Munch_The_Scream_lithography.png/170px-Munch_The_Scream_lithography.png)
- In the article Pick-up sticks:
-
At the end of play, points are tallied up and the pieces can be thrown again or stored in a container for another use.
- Comment: Of course the points are tallied up at the end of the game. Of course players can either play again or put the game away "in a container". (If the rules said to ignore the score sheet at the end, then called for players to burn the game pieces or use them to commit ritual suicide, THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.)
- In the lead of Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum theft:
-
Once inside, the pair
revealed their true intentions,tied up the guards, and spent over an hour stealing art from the museum's collection, which they loaded into their vehicle.
- Comment: The guards probably sensed their visitors' "true intentions" around the time they got tied up, and our readers will make the same inference vicariously. Furthermore, in this modern age most readers will envision art thieves as having a vehicle at the ready. (Had they absconded via public transport, or summoned an Uber, THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.)
- In the article US Airways Flight 1549:
- Comment: Of course it was recorded, otherwise how would we know it?
- Comment: The word quickly is superfluous, because our readers' innate cunning will inform them that controllers generally act with dispatch in such situations. (Had they instead been lackadaisical, THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.)
- Comment: The part from "signalling his intention ..." on is probably unnecessary, because our readers aren't mentally defective. They will conclude without being told that when Sullenberger said "We can't do it ... We're gonna be in the Hudson", he's hinting that (a) he's going to land on the Hudson and (b) he's taking this unconventional step because more orthodox landing sites are out of reach. (Had he instead done it because he wanted a bath, THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.)
- Comment: The immediately bit seems unnecessary. (Had the captain made a cup of tea before ordering "Evacuate!", THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.)
- Comment: If the fire chief, seeing people crowded onto the wings of a sinking airliner, had radioed, "False alarm – no big deal", THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.
- In the article University of Texas Tower Shooting:
-
He then drove to a hardware store, where he purchased a Universal M1 carbine, two additional ammunition magazines and eight boxes of ammunition, telling the cashier he planned to hunt wild hogs. At a gun shop he purchased four further carbine magazines, six additional boxes of ammunition, and a can of gun cleaning solvent. He then drove to Sears, where he purchased a Sears Model 60 12 gauge semi-automatic shotgun before returning home
with his purchases.
- Comment: If he'd bought all that stuff and then left it at the store, THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.
- In the article Charles Whitman:
-
Whitman was reportedly the youngest person
in the worldever to become an Eagle Scout at that time.
- Comment: Are people becoming Eagle Scouts elsewhere than "in the world"? Perhaps on Mars?
- In the article Club of Rome:
-
The Club of Rome raised considerable public attention with its report Limits to Growth, which has sold 30 million copies in more than 30 translations, making it the best-selling environmental book in
worldhistory.
- Comment: I think you see where I'm going with this.
- In the article Saving Private Ryan:
-
In Washington, D.C, General George Marshall is informed that three of the four Ryan brothers have been killed within the last week, and that their mother is about to be notified
of their deaths.
- Comment: Well, this would not have been a good time to notify her that she'd won the Pillsbury Bake-Off.
- In the article Stone's representation theorem for Boolean algebras:
-
The theorem was first proved by Marshall H. Stone (1936)
, and thus named in his honor.
- Comment: And here I thought it was proved by Marshall H. Stone but named for some other Stone.
- In the article Rodney Alcala
-
Her murder
would remain unsolved until itwas connected to Alcala in 2011.
- Comment: Murders usually remain unsolved until they're solved.
- In the article Ted Bundy:
-
He broke through the ceiling into the apartment of the chief jailer—
who was out for the evening with his wife—changed into street clothes from the jailer's closet, and walked out the front doorto freedom.
- Comment: While it's nice to know a busy chief jailer still has time for his spouse, absent mention of a confrontation the reader's common sense will tell him that Mr. and Mrs. Turnkey weren't home. (Had they helped Bundy pick out a tie to go with his new civvies, or had Bundy walked out the door then gone around the corner to turn himself in, THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.)
- In the article Seth Black (serial killer):
-
At the request of Scottish detectives, the Metropolitan Police
conducted a search ofsearched Black's Stamford Hill lodgingsto determine whether any incriminating evidence existed at Black's address.
- Comment: Yes, well, that's usually what they're trying to determine. (And click the link for a surprise.)
- In the article Murder of Jo Cox:
-
He witnessed the assailant stab Cox,
who fell to the ground, before shooting her and stabbing her againshoot her, then stab her again. The attackerleft the scene, butwas pursued by an eyewitness whofollowed himand telephoned police to describe his locationidentified him to police.Armed police officers attended the incident, and arrested a suspect.
- Comment: There's a lot to say about this one.
who fell to the ground: Persons stabbed and shot, then stabbed again, usually go down. (Extra points for the ambiguous suggestion that the witness shot and stabbed the victim.)left the scene: If the shooter/stabber had stuck around, THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.- was pursued by an eyewitness
who followed him: That's what pursuers do. - telephoned police
to describe his location: Usually people calling for help give the location. Armed police officers attended the incident: Even in law-abiding, Queensberry-Rules, you-got-me-copper-fair-and-square England, readers will imagine that amongst officers dispatched to the shooting/stabbing of a Member of Parliament, at least some will be armed with more than their charming accents and unfailing courtesy.and arrested a suspect: That's what happens when an eyewitness points out the gunman. Had police let him off with just a stern talking-to, THAT would be worth mentioning in the article.
- In the article Death of Elisa Lam:
-
On the morning of February 19, an employee went to the roof, where four 1,000-gallon water tanks provided water pumped from the city's supply, to the guest rooms, a kitchen, and a coffee shop downstairs. In one of them, he found Lam's body, floating face up a foot below the water surface.
Police responded.
- Comment: [Left as an exercise for the reader]
- In the article Eric Muenter:
Morgan lunged at his attacker and tackled Muenter to the ground as he fired two rounds into Morgan's groin and thigh. Morgan's butler finished subduing Muenter, beating him senseless with a lump of coal. Morgan quickly
summoned a doctor andrecovered, returning to work on August 14.
- Comment: If financier J.P. Morgan got shot in the groin and didn't summon a doctor, or summoned him other than "quickly", THAT would be worth mentioning in the article. (Kudos to the butler for his skill in wielding the coal.)
- In the article Irish Boundary Commission:
The Irish Boundary Commission
was a commission whichmet in 1924–25 to decide on the precise delineation of the border between the Irish Free State and Northern Ireland.
- Comment: So... the commission was a commission?
- In the article Hardcore Henry:
After she replaces a missing arm and leg with
hi-techcybernetic prostheses, mercenaries led by the psychokinetic Akan raid the ship.
- Comment: What, pray tell, would a lo-tech cybernetic prosthesis look like?
- In the article Chloe:
Chloe (also Chloë, Chloé) is a feminine name
for girls.
- Comment: It might have been more interesting if it were a feminine name for boys or a masculine name for girls.
- In the article
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From left to right: assassinJohn Wilkes Booth, Abraham Lincoln, Mary Todd Lincoln, Clara Harris, and Henry Rathbone
Comment: It's a common misconception that the man with the gun is Mrs. Lincoln.
- In the article The Wizard of Oz (1939 film):
- In the article Donald Trump:
- In the article Phase precession:
- In the article Harry Elkins Widener:
- In the article CNN International:
- In the article James Agee:
- The lead (and only) image in the article Twist tie:
- The lead image in the article Icebox:
- In the article Boston Consolidated TRACON:
- In the article Senghenydd colliery disaster:
- In the article Elizabeth II:
- In the article Karen Carpenter:
-
Paramedics found her heart beating once every 10 seconds. She was taken to nearby Downey Community Hospital
for treatment.
- Comment: Thanks for clarifying.
- In the article Gary M. Heidnik:
-
Heidnik was executed by lethal injection on July 6, 1999, at State Correctional Institution – Rockview in Centre County, Pennsylvania. His body was
latercremated.
- Comment: Not before, thankfully.
- In the article Roy L. Dennis:
-
- His body was donated to UCLA Medical Center
after he died.
- His body was donated to UCLA Medical Center
- Comment: Let us hope so.
- In the article Chuck Schumer:
In March 2009, Schumer announced his support for same-sex marriage, noting that it "was time". Schumer previously supported civil unions. At a private
risottodinner with gay leaders ...
- Comment: This actually illustrates the opposite of the Principle of Some Astonishment – the Principle of Complete Puzzlement. Some details don't belong because, though neither obvious nor even predictable, they're completely irrelevant and will puzzle the reader as to the reason for their inclusion. What does risotto have to do with anything? Would we see Schumer in a different light if instead paella or pilaf or pancakes had been served? What about the kind of wine they drank?
- In the article 2015 Thalys train attack:
-
The remaining passengers were taken to
a gym inArras, where they were searched and identified before being allowed to proceed to Paris.
- Comment: So we'll know they could get in some cardio while waiting?
The June 18 New Yorker has an article about corn. It's the first in what appears to be a series, no less, discussing the major grains. What about corn? Who knows? Only The New Yorker would have the lofty disdain for its readers to expect them to plow through 22,000 words about corn (warning: only an estimate; the TNR fact checkers are still counting) without giving them the slightest hint why. Here is how it starts (after a short introductory poem):
Now, there are some facts for you. No doubt every single one of them has been checked. You stand in awe as they tumble toward you, magnificently irrelevant, surrounded by mighty commas, mere numbers swollen into giant phrases ("two thousand eight hundred and ninety-seven"), all finally crashing over you with the bravura announcement that nothing you have just read is "of any real consequence." How true this is! From the end of the paragraph, you gaze back on the receding vistas of inconsequence, as far as the eye can see. Even supposing we would like a bit more information about corn, and even supposing we might be relieved to know how many other plants, edible and otherwise, are not going to be discussed in this article, why are we being told about a man whose count apparently was off by half? Even supposing we need to know about Dr. Sturtevant’s book, when it was published, and when the good doctor died, why do we need to know when he retired? Even—stretching it—supposing that we need to know that this gentleman "was also a graduate of the Harvard Medical School," why, oh why, do we have to learn that he "never practiced medicine"? As for the business about tree bark, that has just got to be conscious self-parody.
- Puckish citations
- ^ "Fawlty Towers: 20 of Basil's best rants". The Daily Telegraph. November 27, 2015. Retrieved September 12, 2017.
![](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/6/6f/The_Wizard_of_Oz_Bert_Lahr_1939.jpg/110px-The_Wizard_of_Oz_Bert_Lahr_1939.jpg)
Comment: Not a bad case of hirsutism?
![](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/52/Turnberry_Hotel.jpg/220px-Turnberry_Hotel.jpg)
Comment: The reader will know without being told that this is a "view". (While Wee Eck would feel insulted that the reader didn't know where Ayrshire was, it's possible that the reader comes from some obscure place such as North Dakota where they might think it was just outside London.)
![](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/0/0c/Trump_Rally_in_Cincinnati.jpg/220px-Trump_Rally_in_Cincinnati.jpg)
Comment: We're safe in assuming that the reader will intuit that this "view" shows a "crowd".
![](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/3/33/Eeg_theta.svg/220px-Eeg_theta.svg.png)
Comment: Could have been worse – it could have said Example of a graph of an EEG theta wave.
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Comment: Did I mention that it's Harry Elkins Widener? |
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Comment: No shit, Sherlock. |
![](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/e/ef/James-agee-park-knoxville-tn1.jpg/220px-James-agee-park-knoxville-tn1.jpg)
Comment: Who would have guessed?
![](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/e/ea/Twist-ties.jpg/220px-Twist-ties.jpg)
Comment: Great example of an image that doesn't need a caption.
Comment: We can see it's labeled, we can see it's black-and-white, we can see it's an image, and the discerning reader will realize, given that this is the article Icebox, that it's an icebox.
Comment: And here I thought they had a giant indoor lawn, miniature building-within-a-building, and artificial sky.
![](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/c/cd/Senghenydd_pit_disaster_24.jpg/220px-Senghenydd_pit_disaster_24.jpg)
![](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/d/d6/ILN_%E2%80%93_Senghenydd_Colliery_Disaster_3.jpeg/220px-ILN_%E2%80%93_Senghenydd_Colliery_Disaster_3.jpeg)
Funerals are for dead people.
![](http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/2/25/President_and_Mrs._Nixon_meet_with_Her_Majesty_the_Queen_and_Prime_Minister_Heath_in_England_-_NARA_-_194333.tif/lossy-page1-150px-President_and_Mrs._Nixon_meet_with_Her_Majesty_the_Queen_and_Prime_Minister_Heath_in_England_-_NARA_-_194333.tif.jpg)
Comment: Yes, because we weren't sure which of the three is Edward Heath. (Apparently you're on your own for Pat Nixon vs. the Queen.)
Principle of Complete Puzzlement
Michael Kinsley's "Department of Amplification: William Shawn and the temple of facts" (The New Republic, 1984) is a pitch-perfect sendup of The New Yorker as "a weekly monument to the proposition that journalism consists of the endless accretion of tiny details":
When the New England farmer and botanist Edward Sturtevant retired, in 1887, as head of the New York Agricultural Experiment Station, in Geneva, he left behind a bulky manuscript that was published in 1919, twenty-one years after his death, as "Sturtevant's Notes on Edible Plants." Dr. Sturtevant, who was also a graduate of the Harvard Medical School, but never practiced medicine, had scoured the world’s botanical literature for mentions of all the plants that human beings were known to have eaten (he did not count tree bark, which in times of famine was often one of them), and had come up with among more than three hundred thousand known plant species, two thousand eight hundred and ninety-seven edibles. (Latter-day scientists believe he may have missed as many more.) But, of all these, only a hundred and fifty or so have ever been widely enough consumed to figure in commerce, and of those a mere handful have been of any real consequence.
Remind you of any Wikipedia articles?