Wikipedia:Peer review/List of X-planes/archive1
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This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because…
I'm looking to bring this list to FL status, and would like feedback on what needs improving to reach it. (For the record on one issue I'm aware of: there's no image of the X-16 because the two photographs on Commons of it are both listed for deletion). Anyway, any and all help and suggestions would be appreciated!
Thanks, The Bushranger Return fireFlank speed 14:55, 11 May 2010 (UTC)
GraemeLeggett
[edit]- No reason that a lack of an image would prevent FL status.
- Technically I think page numbers would be useful for all the references
- It could use citation templates for the references GraemeLeggett (talk) 16:15, 11 May 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks. I think I've got page numbers in. I'm not sure about the citation comment mention - everything in 'Bibliography' currently uses either cite-book or cite-web? - The Bushranger Return fireFlank speed 00:05, 20 May 2010 (UTC)
Brianboulton
[edit]Brianboulton comments: A well-prepared and comprehensive-looking list. The lead could be developed more, to give a better sense of 60-plus years of history, and there are numerous prose issues requiring attention.
- Prose points in lead
- "testing of new technologies" → "testing new technologies"
- "Some X-planes have been highly publicised and record-breaking programs..." Doesn't really work. The two things - "highly publicised" and "record-breaking" - don't go naturally together, and planes are not in themselves "programs". The word "highly occurs again, later in the sentence. Suggest rephrase and simplify the sentence thus: "Some X-planes programs have been well publicised, while others, such as the X-16, have been developed secretly."
- "well known" in this context does not have a hyphen. Suggest: "...became well known in 1947 as the first plane to break the sound barrier.
- "yielded important research results" - is it possible to mention briefly the fields to which these results related?
- "...only the North American X-15 rocket plane of the early 1960s achieved comparable fame." Comparable to what?
- "Most X-planes are not expected to ever go into full-scale production, and usually only a few are produced." The word "ever" is superfluous. In fact, the second part of the sentence is basically repeating what's been said in the first part, and can be removed.
- "One exception to the rule was the Lockheed Martin X-35, which competed against the Boeing X-32 for selection as Joint Strike Fighter and production as the F-35." Remove the cliché "to the rule", and clarify the ending, thus: "One exception was the Lockheed Martin X-35, which competed against the Boeing X-32 for selection as Joint Strike Fighter, and entered production as the F-35."
- NACA and NASA should be fully spelt out on first mention, e.g. "National Advisory Committee for Aeronautics (NACA)" Suggest you begin the sentence "Most X-planes..."
- Reposition "however", thus: "However, not all US experimental aircraft have been designated in the X-plane series;..."
- List
- General point: some of the notes are too cryptic and/or technical in nature to make much sense to the general reader.
- Link Mach 3
- Link testbed (first mention)
- X14 - repetition of the words "Vectored thrust" in notes
Brianboulton (talk) 12:54, 19 May 2010 (UTC)
- Much thanks! I'll get to work fixing those things. :) - The Bushranger Return fireFlank speed 14:35, 19 May 2010 (UTC)
Ian Rose
[edit]What a good idea for a high-quality list! Looks thoroughly cited, and of course well illustrated. Comments:
- Second Brian's recommendation to expand the lead
- Aside from Brian's prose comments, another suggestion I have for improving The first of the X-planes, the Bell X-1, became well known as, in 1947, it was the first aircraft to break the sound barrier in level flight. (bit clunky all round) is The first of the X-planes, the Bell X-1, became well known as the first aircraft to break the sound barrier in level flight, on 14 October 1947.
- You don't need to repeat the links for manufacturers and so on after the first instance in the table.
- You don't need to repeat the links in the lead and table with ones in See Also, e.g. Skunk Works (there may be others).
Cheers, Ian Rose (talk) 02:17, 30 May 2010 (UTC)
- Ah, well, the multiple links remain from the original table. I'll see about lead expansion and delinking soon. Thanks for the feedback! - The Bushranger Return fireFlank speed 02:58, 30 May 2010 (UTC)