Talk:Rene Bourque/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Orlandkurtenbach (talk) 05:42, 4 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for criteria)

It is reasonably well written.
a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects): b (focused):
It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias:
It is stable.
No edit wars, etc.:
It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall:
Pass/Fail:

Lead

I don't think I'd withhold passing the article because of this, but something about the lead seems off to me. The division of paragraphs seems incohesive; the three sentences in the second paragraph are all unrelated to one another. Maybe if you could just try and re-work it a little bit. Not sure what to suggest though..
- Did some reworking. Better, hopefully?
When was the contract signed?
How did Canada do in the 2010 WC? It's not mentioned anywhere in the article.

Early life

"He is Metis heritage." Very sudden; needs better flow within the paragraph.
Don't know if I'm missing something, but how is it that the family settled in Lac La Biche when he was seven, yet he was born there? Did they move from Lac La Biche to Edmonton back to Lac La Biche? Needs some clarification.
- I have a problem here where logic and sources defy each other. Logically, he was born in Edmonton, then moved to LLB. One recent source (on the Heritage Classic) says he was born in Edmonton, but everything else, including his NHL and Calgary Flames profiles, say LLB. So at present, it seems LLB --> Edmonton --> LLB is what the sources indicate. I may email the Flames for clarification, but for now have simplified to minimize confusion

Playing career

I realize that his college career isn't as notable as his professional career, but I feel like it could be expanded to mroe than a sentence. How'd the team do? Any championships? Lead his team in scoring any years?
Which goalie did he score his first goal against?
- Giguere, but I've never viewed that as particularly relevant. I'm happy to add it in if you think it should be there.
Some numbers spelled out, others not. Needs consistency.
Paragraph beginning "The Calgary Flames..." is very sudden. Needs better flow.
Regarding the re-aggravation of his injury in the 09 playoffs, did he miss any time or did he play through it?
Can you try and figure out what the November 09 injury was? It may have been undisclosed at the time, but there's gotta be a report somewhere after the fact.
- I did, and just tried again. There is no mention of what the injury was, only that he missed six games.
Maybe reword "his fine play"?
Delcaring him as the Flames top winger needs a reference, I think.
"He was invited to play for Team Canada..." Also appears suddenly.

References

Reference 8 needs an access date.
Refs 17, 26 and 19 appear to be dead.

Don't hesitate to ask if you have any questions about my comments. Good luck! Orlandkurtenbach (talk) 05:45, 4 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Ooh.. also, I forgot to mention this in the review, but what kind of player is Bourque? Could you mention somewhere in the article his playing style, how he's known to play, etc? Orlandkurtenbach (talk) 22:57, 4 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Ok, this should all be addressed. Anything without a specific comment is just "fixed/done/added/removed", etc. ;) Reso lute 00:49, 5 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Awesome! Nice work. Orlandkurtenbach (talk) 22:50, 5 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]