Talk:Hafizullah Amin/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Grandiose (talk · contribs) 08:42, 31 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

I will review this article shortly. Grandiose (me, talk, contribs) 08:42, 31 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

I've fixed the problems with the ISBNs – do you know why several had their last (check) digit wrong? Seems a bit odd, I don't suppose there's anything more to it? Grandiose (me, talk, contribs) 08:56, 31 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

"son of a civil servant" ~ are we to assume this is his father (rather than mother)? Probably best saying "...his father, a civil servant, died whilst..."

Done --Demiurge1000 (talk) 23:06, 31 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

"On 18 April 1978 Mir Akbar Khyber was killed" ~ a couple of words telling us who he is is probably warranted;

Done (turns out he wasn't named after Admiral Ackbar after all) --Demiurge1000 (talk) 23:09, 31 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

"Deputy Chairman of the Council of Ministers,[24] and Mohammad Aslam Watanjar became Deputy Chairman of the Council of Ministers" ~ there are two deputy chairmen (or more)? Might eb worth phrasing it to make that clearer. Perhaps "a Deputy" or something.
"few returned, including Karmal and Mohammad Najibullah" ~ this makes it sound like they are among the few, not the many;

Fixed Done --Demiurge1000 (talk) 23:13, 31 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

"to let Amin go" ~ what does this mean? Sacked? Anything more?

Is "HDCC" a (repeated) typo, or a different organisation?

Fixed by User:TIAYN so

Done (seemingly it was a typo) --Demiurge1000 (talk) 10:12, 1 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Done "He came to power by assassinating his predecessor Nur Muhammad Taraki." is not covered in the article as far as I can see: a bit about ousting him, nothing about having him assassinated.

Done "His view can be explained by the fact that the Soviet Union, after several months, decided to send troops into Afghanistan." ~ does indeed need clarification, doesn't seem to follow.

Done "Several others also hesitated, claiming, in contradiction of what their commanders Yuri Drozdov and Vasily Kolesnik had told them (they in turn had been informed by the Soviet leadership, that it seemed strange that Amin, who had welcomed Soviet troops in Afghanistan, could be an American sympathiser[77] (accused of being a "CIA Agent")[78] and to have betrayed the Saur Revolution.[clarification needed] " ~ The grammar doesn't follow and the point isn't clear.

Lead image's copyright status should be given specifically as falling under "Simple photographs do not enjoy copyright protection and are thus in the public domain." I believe its licence also requires that it was unpublished in the United States within 30 days of publication in Afghanistan. The source is broken, which makes all of this very difficult to verify. Worth looking for another version of this photograph from another source.

That's all, everything else (scope, referencing, etc.) fine. On hold. Grandiose (me, talk, contribs) 09:43, 31 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

OK, I've shored up the image for you, sufficient for GA. Will give the article a final look today or tomorrow. (Also, the source turned out not to be broken, oddly.) Grandiose (me, talk, contribs) 08:30, 4 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]

I need some help with reference #31, the first one I've checked. I don't see verification of "and to vote on whether or not to reorganise the Council of Ministers and to enhance the power of the executive (the Chairman of the Revolutionary Council)." in the source. There might be some terminology differences, but I just can't see it. Could you assist? I will be doing further checks today and tomorrow in this vein, particularly if this one is problematic. Grandiose (me, talk, contribs) 12:11, 5 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]

My fault; the correct page number was 163–164 and not 163; the Council of Ministers was the name of the government of Communist Afghanistan... --TIAYN (talk) 21:33, 7 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Two refs are now the same - but that's not a requirement, I'm now happy to pass. Might take me 24 hours. Grandiose (me, talk, contribs) 20:08, 8 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]