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Talk:HMT Richard Bacon

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Good articleHMT Richard Bacon has been listed as one of the Warfare good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it.
Article milestones
DateProcessResult
September 7, 2012Good article nomineeListed
Did You Know
A fact from this article appeared on Wikipedia's Main Page in the "Did you know?" column on September 3, 2011.
The text of the entry was: Did you know ... that Richard Bacon had a lengthy career in fishing, as well as serving in both world wars?

GA Review

[edit]
This review is transcluded from Talk:HMS Richard Bacon/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Mark Arsten (talk · contribs) 16:19, 3 September 2012 (UTC)[reply]

  • Alright, I finally got around to reading this. It seems pretty close to GA status, a bit of copyediting and perhaps some rephrasing/small additions needed. I've made some copyedits myself, feel free to revert any of them that introduce errors. Length is not an issue, given the subject.

Lead

  • You might want to note its nation of origin in the lead, it might not be obvious to everyone.
  • Also, you might want to expand this just a little more.

First world war and subsequent civilian service

  • "she was mostly used for coastal anti-submarine patrols" Is there a good place to link "anti-submarine patrols"?
  • "Richard Bacon was built at Cook, Welton & Gemmell, Hull." You might want to write out "in Hull" so it doesn't look like it's part of the name.
  • "In 1923 she was transferred to Fleetwood, near Blackpool, when the company moved." You might want to restate the name here instead of "the company".
  • "She also regained the same manager as during her previous spell with the Boston company, Fred Parkes." Is there a good way to tighten this sentence up a bit, it feels somewhat wordy.
  • "and covered 6,100 statute miles (9,800 km)," You might want to link "statute miles" here.

Second World War

  • "On 29 August 1939, with the Second World War imminent, she was" Since this is a new subsection, I think you should write the name out instead of using "she".
  • "The hire rate was £84.6.0d per month." You might want to add a note about a modern equivalent to that sum.

Post-war

  • "which was in the middle of 40' waves." I'd suggest writing out the measurement here.
  • There are a few places some measurement conversion would be useful, "and 100 miles later", "23 miles distant", "during an 85mph gale" & "140 tons of coal"

General

  • Check for consistency in the use of commas after dates, i.e. "In 1940 [no comma] this happened" vs "In 1941, that happened"
  • There's an error message coming up for ISBN 978-1-935149--07-1, could you double check it? Mark Arsten (talk) 20:21, 5 September 2012 (UTC)[reply]
I've fixed the issues you've raised, I think - would you mind giving it another look? The Cavalry (Message me) 23:18, 5 September 2012 (UTC)[reply]
Alright, sounds good, I'll take another look later today and will probably pass it then. Mark Arsten (talk) 14:44, 7 September 2012 (UTC)[reply]