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Talk:UConn Huskies women's basketball/GA1

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Reviewer: Jaguar (talk · contribs) 17:03, 6 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]


I'll take this. JAGUAR  17:03, 6 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Initial comments

[edit]
  • "team represents the University of Connecticut in Storrs, Connecticut in NCAA" - make sure you explain what this stands for
Rephrased --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016
  • "and the XL Center in Hartford" - where is Hartford?
Fixed --- Oakraven81, 06 May 2016
  • The first paragraph of the Early years (1974-1991) section is unsourced
Citations added --- Oakraven81, 06 May 2016
  • "again in 1990, again losing in the first round. .[4]" - weird formatting
Fixed --- Oakraven81, 06 May 2016
  • 1991 Dream season unsourced
Citations added --- Oakraven81, 06 May 2016
  • 1995 National Championship: undefeated (35-0) section mostly unsourced. Please ensure that every paragraph has at least one citation
Citations added --- Oakraven81, 07 May 2016
  • "and Shea Ralph was named the Final Four's MVP" - link MVP
Linked --- Oakraven81, 07 May 2016
  • Diana Taurasi era (2001-2004) unsourced
Citations added --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016
  • First paragraph of the 2003 National Championship repeat section unsourced
Citations added --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016
  • Rebuilding years (2005–2007), 2009 National Championship: undefeated (39–0) and 2010 National Championship repeat: undefeated (39–0) sections are all mostly unsourced
Citations added --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016

The prose is decent, but the GA criteria requires that all paragraphs should at least end with one citation. Please make sure that everything is sourced and addressed. On hold for seven days. 17:09, 6 May 2016 (UTC)

Comments from other editors

[edit]
  • Per WP:LEAD, the lead should be a concise overview of the article; given its length, I'd expect a healthier three or four paragraphs, with a bit of attention paid to the early days and a mention of coach Auriemma.
Modified --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016
  • numeric ranges and scores should use en dashes, not hyphens; the article is inconsistent in that respect—compare "(2001-2004)" and "(2005–2007)" in the above Initial comments section.
Fixed --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016
  • In Early years (1974-1991), there's inconsistency in how seasons are denoted. 1985–1986 should be 1985–86, but 1987 and 1988 should surely be 1986–87 and 1987–88, since seasons start and end in different years, and it's not always clear that a single year will indicate the end of the season. Please address this throughout the article
Fixed --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016
  • I'd also delete the word "quickly" from before "showed steady signs of progress"
Deleted --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016
  • Second paragraph:
    • (she will repeat in her junior and senior years): keep this in the past tense, i.e., she also won the award in her junior and senior years
Fixed --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016
    • along with its first ever NCAA tournament appearance that ended in a first round loss. Two things:
      • "first ever" should be "first-ever"
Fixed --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016
      • does this mean that they had a prior NCAA tournament that didn't end in the first-round loss? Please reword.
Modified --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016
    • in the next sentence, please either wikilink or explain "role players"
Modified --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016
    • according to the Season-by-season results table, the 1990 tournament ended with a second-round loss, though it was after a bye in the first round according to the tournament article. Please fix the wording here to reflect that.
Modified --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016
  • 1991 Dream season: again, should be a year range. More important, the term "Dream season" seems like a phrase to watch (as in "words to watch"). This is something that needs sourcing, and it should almost certainly be cited. Other issues:
Deleted term "dream season" as I didn't find any reliable source using this expression --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016
    • broke through in a surprising way on the national scene. Why "a surprising way"?
Modified --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016
    • was the #3 seed for the whole tournament? If so, then UConn would have been expected to make the Final Four. I suspect this seed is not overall, in which case, you need to explain what this was a seed for
Clarified --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016
    • UConn won 81-80 a thrilling opening round game: this needs to be reordered, and "thrilling" is one of the GA criteria's "words to watch"—please use something more factual unless you're quoting a reliable source.
Modified --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016
    • please wikilink or explain both ACC and NC State (I'd definitely write out the latter)
Fixed --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016
    • also a first for any Big East school: this definitely needs a citation.
Citation added --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016
    • Say what the Bascom record was—how many points. And, since it seems to have been hundreds of points above the previous recordholder, she must have been the top scorer at UConn for quite a while, so she had just added the final points to her growing margin; this should be rephrased to reflect that. Also, delete the mention of Nykesha Sales; this is described later in the article, and shouldn't be duplicated here.
Fixed --- Oakraven81, 08 May 2016

I don't have time to do any further checking; please review the article throughout for unexplained terms that need wikilinking, hyphens that should be dashes, dates that should be ranges, words to watch, etc. While the prose is decent, it falls short of "clear and concise", the GA standard, in places: some sentences should be simplified or restructured. Thank you; best of luck with the review. BlueMoonset (talk) 19:09, 6 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

I found a bit more time, so here are some additional comments:

  • I mentioned above that "thrilling" is one of the GA criteria's "words to watch"; there are still four instances of it being used in the article, and I suspect all should be replaced. If it's a close game, say that rather than "thrilling". Encyclopedic prose should not follow the typical sports reporting prose: words like crushed, steamrolled, and the like should be replaced by more appropriate words.
✓ Fixed --- Oakraven81, 09 May 2016
  • Another criterion is that articles must follow WP:LAYOUT: one place where the article deviates is in the "A new powerhouse is born" section, with bold italic faux headers. Please only use regular section headers, formed with the equal signs.
✓ Fixed --- Oakraven81, 09 May 2016
  • Please avoid made-up words in section headers and elsewhere, such as "three-peat" and "four-peat". Again, think encyclopedic.
✓ Fixed --- Oakraven81, 09 May 2016
  • Diana Taurasi era section:
    • what does "prep career" mean? If it's high school, then say high school; if not, then wikilink
Fixed --- Oakraven81, 09 May 2016
    • "role players" appears here; since you removed the previous instance, this is now the only place where the phrase appears and needs to be explained
Fixed --- Oakraven81, 09 May 2016
    • both "semifinals" and "semi-finals" are used in this section, and elsewhere. Please pick one and use it throughout the article (and be consistent with other "finals" constructions).
Fixed --- Oakraven81, 09 May 2016
  • Maya Moore era section:
    • In the 2010 National Championship subsection, there's an odd "Anyway" that starts a sentence; please recast so it is not necessary.
Fixed --- Oakraven81, 09 May 2016
  • Brianna Stewart era section:
    • In the 2013 National Championship subsection, the second paragraph mentions the "Catholic 7", but there are only six names listed. Either someone is missing, or perhaps the nickname should be dropped.
Fixed --- Oakraven81, 09 May 2016
    • Also in that second paragraph, while it says that the UConn–Notre Dame rivalry was transformed (please use an en dash rather than a hyphen), it doesn't say how, and should. For that matter, it doesn't even say what conference UConn ended up in, which should certainly be included here: American Athletic Conference.
Rephrased --- Oakraven81, 09 May 2016

Thanks for the hard work. BlueMoonset (talk) 07:32, 9 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you for your contribution --- Oakraven81, 09 May 2016
Thank you for your dedication to this GAN, Oakraven! With all of the issues addressed, I think this is good to go now. Well done. JAGUAR  21:59, 9 May 2016 (UTC)[reply]