DescriptionTrying it on. Aut Caesar aut nullus.jpg
English: Cartoon, "Trying it on: Aut Caesar aut nullus." Depiction of U.S. President Ulysses S. Grant, King Kalakaua of Hawaii, and others. Caption:
"There has been a great deal of conjecture as to the object of King Kalakaua's visit to Washington; but I am enabled to give you the true solution of the problem. For some time there have been correspondence and negotiations going on between an intimate friend of the President and King Kalakaua. Ulysses, finding his chances for becoming a Caesar in the United States rapidly fading away, determined that he would be Caesar or nobody. He has traded his farm and dogs in Missouri with the King for the Sandwich Islands, of which he expects to take possession March 5th, 1877. As an extra inducement, King Kalakaua had been ceded all Grant's right, title and interest in the Washington Ring, the San Domingo Job and Seneca Stone Company. The inclosed sketch is a view of the last private rehearsal in the Cabinet-room, with the following conversation.—Gap"
"Kalakaua—"Messrs, Ministers, when you address royalty, go down on your knees and say 'Your Majesty,' which, as you have long been used to that, will not be a difficult task. After your genuflections, you will present him with his morning lunch."
"King Ulysses—"This is not quite the height of my ambition, but I can have my own way, and smoke in peace. Well, Kalakaua, I'll sign the contract, anyway. I thought could rule the American people, but they want me to serve them. Republics are ungrateful."
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